You Spin Me Round: Coldplay

A Seattle woman lived out one of my many unrealized dreams: she beat up some dude as he attempted some weak karaoke. The unnamed man stood onstage in a Seattle karaoke bar singing Coldplay’s first big hit, “Yellow,” when the woman (whom witnesses described as a “little hippie girl”) bellowed, “Oh no, not that song. I can’t stand that song!” Then the shit hit the fan…

She then leaped at the would-be singer, shouted expletives at him and told him his singing “sucked”, while expressing the same opinion of the song, according to a Seattle police report.

She pushed the man and punched him, all in an effort to stop his singing.

Other patrons went to the singer’s aid and hauled the 21-year-old woman outside.

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Robert Willmette one the barmen at Changes said: “It took three or four of us to hold her down.”

The incident stirred up a scene both inside and outside the club; after the woman reportedly punched the bartender in the face a couple of times, she “went crazy.” Police eventually arrived, blocking off the entire street to ensure other Coldplay fans in the neighborhood wouldn’t be injured. Police finally cuffed the crazy broad, charging her with assault.

Next time he’s in Seattle, I think Chris Martin better watch his ass and look out for hippies.

MP3: Coldplay – “Yellow”