Yet Another Bitter Little Pill For Alanis


For the second and what looks to be the final time in their relationship, Alanis Morissette and Ryan Reynolds have decided to go their separate ways. They met in 2002, got engaged in 2004 and broke-up briefly this past June and then reconciled. PR representatives for the two, released a joint statement to People, stating:

“Ryan Reynolds and Alanis Morissette have mutually decided to end their engagement.

“They remain close friends and continue to have the utmost love and admiration for each other. They ask that their privacy be respected surrounding this personal matter.”

Just once, I’d like to read a joint statement from a celebrity couple that has them asking for “extra-attention from the blood-thirsty media” and that “both individuals would like to state for the record that they were faking it from the get-go” and “wish each other would rot in hell and contract a bunch of STDs from all their future, less-attractive partners.” That way, I’ll feel slightly better about myself when I decide to make up all that stuff about them eventually anyways.