Possibly Formerly Pregnant Angelina Jolie On The Cover Of ‘Vanity Fair’

May 30th, 2008 // 12 Comments

I think her hair is pregnant, too. We still don’t know for sure if she’s given birth to the Godly Ones, yet! In the meantime, we have her Vanity Fair July issue interview to pore over. Angelina Jolie talks about pregnancy, her gigantic multi-culti family, and how nannies aren’t allowed to spend the night! They might see the naked skinny-dipping!

Angelina says she’s giving her Swiss Family United Nations “the childhood she never had.”

“When I was growing up I wanted to adopt, because I was aware there were kids that didn’t have parents. It’s not a humanitarian thing, because I don’t see it as a sacrifice. It’s a gift. We’re all lucky to have each other. I look at Shiloh–because, obviously, physically, she is the one that looks like Brad and I when we were little–and say, ‘If these were our brothers and sisters, how much would we have known by the time we were six that it took into our 30s and 40s to figure out?’ I suppose I’m giving them the childhood I always wished I had.”

And why aren’t nannies allowed to spend the evening? Because there’s no need! Angie is in charge of all things!

“We don’t ever have anybody spend the night. We may have to adjust that when the next one comes. But we do have ladies that work with us, and they’re also from different cultures and back-grounds. One lady’s a Vietnamese teacher–wonderful. One is of Congolese descent from Bel-gium. Another is from the States and is really creative and does art programs.”

The one from the States is a total concubine. For both of them. That’s what “creative” means.

By J. Harvey
asl

  1. peachpie

    her breasteses look like they’re going to jump up and smother her face! scary.

    *whispers to senor harvey that there’s an awkward typo… “the childhood she (N)ever had.” in the 2nd para.*

  2. peachpie

    and don’t think i’m not sitting here with an asl martini waiting, waiting, eeevvveeerrrr so patiently, for the commentary surely forthcoming on fiddy and shaniqua. burning houses, shout downs in the street, screaming accusations on the sidewalk…. d-d-d-dayum!

  3. T-Bone

    Ewwww! Not a good photo.

  4. devil

    Okay, I don’t think she’s good-looking to begin with…but couldn’t they get a better picture? Even many of those Nat’l Enquirer photos were more flattering than this.

    AJ is smart to keep the female hired help at a distance. Brad’s a former cheater, which means he’ll probably always be a cheater.

  5. Tracy

    I would think the help couldn’t sleep over to avoid the uncomfortable (and imminent) confrontation when Brad discovers one them under Angie’s skirt.

  6. someone

    If that Photo was anymore airbrushed and photoshopped, it wouldn’t look at all like her..It doesn’t look much like her anyway. Shes not nearly that pretty. I bet all the nannies are over 60 and fat…Wouldn’t want to distract Bradley.

  7. Dingo

    “Vanity Fair July issue interview to pour over” -should be “pore”.

  8. the phantom

    What a creep.

  9. yasbella

    Ha.
    She darn right knows WHY she can’t have nannies or females living in the house. Because she knows, from EXPERIENCE, if Brad stays around another woman for too long he’s gonna leave her a%%.

  10. erika

    Once again, in a rather cryptic way, she is alluding to the fact of the poor, pitiful little ones she adopted, and the privileged Shiloh. Get over it, Angie! Shiloh is feeling those vibes from you.

  11. Kelly

    “Swiss Family United Nations” AAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!

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