Usher Is Alive! He’s Aliveeeeee!

April 11th, 2012 // Leave a Comment

The Global Associated News needs to sharpen their investigative journalism skills, because they reported that Usher died today in a car crash (and their site states – in bold red font – that the story is still developing).

“Usher died in a single vehicle crash on Route 80 between Morristown and Roswell.  He was pronounced dead at the scene by paramedics responding to the vehicle accident and was identified by photo ID found on his body.  Alcohol and drugs do not appear to have been a factor in this accident on April 10, 2012.  Highway Safety Investigators have told reporters that Usher lost control while driving a friend’s vehicle on Interstate 80 and rolled the vehicle several times killing him instantly”

“I must’ve died and went to heaven…Alive and cold kickin a**!!” Usher tweeted after hearing that he passed away.  ”Never scared, never dead…Just #Lookin 4 myself. URIV”

Best part of the story, which is still up on the site: “Memorial services for Usher have not yet been announced. The service is expected to be a closed casket funeral due to the severe head trauma.”

What nutters these people be.

By Kelly Lynch
asl

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