TomKat’s Baby Revealed To Be An Alien

It’s kind of croc like isn’t it.

Proud dad Tom Cruise last night said new baby daughter Suri was “gorgeous” – and praised fiancée Katie Holmes for giving birth in silence like a true Scientologist.

Cruise, 43, told pals he had been “jumping on couches” since Katie gave birth to the 7lb 7oz tot on Tuesday.

Speaking publicly for the first time since the birth, Tom said: “It’s a girl! It’s a girl! Her name is Suri and she’s gorgeous.”

And he praised his fiancée for staying silent during the birth saying: “Kate was, and is, an absolute champ.”

It’s been revealed that Katie Holmes took the epidural during the birth of Suri. With Tom holding Katie’s hand and stroking her face during the birth, the she was able to stifle and moans (the gag helped as well) during the birthing process. Everyone in the room remained silent during the birth, and made hand signals to communicate.

Despite’s all of Tom’s preparation for a home birth (in the home hospital), Katie insisted on having the baby in a proper hospital. I have a feeling she may have threatened to blurt out something inappropriate during the birth in order to get her way. Tom recorded the whole birth on tape for supposedly prosperity’s sake, but here is where things get strange.

A Scientology insider said: “Tom would have been required to report back about the birth, tell them if it was silent or not and if Katie was given drugs. He would have been asked to hand over notes and recordings to supervisors who will determine if anything traumatic happened to the mother and baby. If so, Katie will be given extra counselling — or auditing as the church calls it.”

A few Katie and Tom remainders: Some nice cooked placenta, and and addictive game in which you have to catch Tom’s Crazy Pills to keep Katie quiet during birth.

Plus little Suri Cruise has her own myspace already.

Brave Katie stayed silent [The Sun]

(Image via WOW Report)