The Two Sides Of Jordan

December 20th, 2005 // 16 Comments

Loving mother. See the other side after the jump.

(Image via Dlisted)

Big-breasted whore.

(Image via Hollywood Rag)

By Miu von Furstenberg

  1. King Smart Ian

    “let’s see – is this boy’s head bigger or smaller than my left tit?”

  2. Is it wrong to say that he is one homely looking kid? Yeah, it probably is, but I’ll say it anyway.

  3. GirlyGirl

    The last time she was on here- gawdwful wedding pictures, truly a fashion tragedy- I said something about the kid. Uh, I think it was something like ‘Who is the Ooompa Loompa in the pictures?’ And all of these people jumped my shit. Apparently- something is wrong with that 3rd world monster baby. I don’t know. I don’t care. She sells her ass for cash- which is a beautiful. Then let me look at her ass. I don’t want to see some poor little bastard that looks like the offspring of Imelda Marcos and Andre the Giant.

    Happy Holidays!

  4. Girly, you have made me feel better about my nasty little quip. Thanks, and Happy Holidays!

  5. GirlyGirl

    You are most welcome, lawgirl. If we can’t be snarky here, where in god’s name can we be?!?!?!

    p.s. I TOTALLY prefer the ‘big-breasted whore’ Jordan. I know its Christmas and all of us WASPs are supposed to be all into the Virgin Mary & Child business- but give me a gal rocking fishnets and big tits any day over that whole maternal crap thing…

  6. Haha!! I guess you’re not as girly as I thought you would be… I’ll take the fishnets too.

  7. torry081105

    Honestly, what is wrong with that child? He looks like one of those giant babies you see on the Maury Povich show…

  8. Purrceptive

    Her son was born blind. Here is a link to an old article about it.

  9. Now this is a while back, but I think I remember from sex ed that babies born to women who have gonorrhea (sp?) are under the risk of being blind. Did I make that up or did I actually learn this? I can’t tell.

  10. GirlyGirl

    Do I feel badly the poor little child is blind?
    Um, yeah. I may be pervy but I’m not a heartless bitch.

    But do I want to see his mama acting all mommily?
    Uh, no. Bring on the parade of whores…

    And to be brutal here, if she were my mother, seeing her crotch shot there on Playboy might just be enough to make me poke my own eyeballs out (there’s a little cultural refernce for all of you kiddies- Oedipus. Fucked his mom. Killed his dad, figured it out, poked his eyeballs out. The End. Don’t tell me I didn’t get my 40g worth out of grad school for a degree in my native tongue)

  11. Violet Secret

    His optical nerve didn’t connect properly to his eyes, which is a hereditary condition. Everyone blames her, but… perhaps maybe it’s the father’s genes at work, too. He’s also autistic (more common in boys than girls) and has other health problems.

  12. browneyedgirl

    i hope u were joking Violet Secret. the father is NOT autistic. He’s a very popular soccer player.. or at least used to be in his prime.

  13. Bay Girl

    he also has hormonal growth problems (obviously)

    not a nice thing to be ripping shit out of – so go take the piss out of your friendly neighbourhood disabled kid.

    yo mammas would be so proud

  14. Browneyedgirl- violet was saying the BOY is autistic, not the dad!!! duh! (just kidding).

  15. Violet Secret

    Lawgirl’s correct, I meant Harvey is autistic.

  16. Bestdress

    This woman must be slightly out of her mind…Why would she take sexy pictures with her song period? It really doesn’t matter that he has other conditions. It’s her son not her man. This is sick!

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