‘The Real Housewives Of New York City’-We Missed You (We Think)

Season 4 of The Real Housewives Of New York City barreled on in and this time we were somewhat prepared.  Somewhat.  While Jill Zarin did a little PR clean-up (which we appreciate), Alex McCord is starting to fall apart at the seams.  Join me as I piece together bits from last night.

1)  I forgot about Alex’s ridiculous “Anchor’s Away” neckline, which is the New York equivalent of a cat sweater.

2) Sonja Morgan’s intro line was left off the update list:  “I have a taste for luxury, and luxury has a taste for me.”  Cohen, take care of this.

3) Has anyone sampled Ramona Singer’s Pinot Grigio yet?  Did you get drunk and unruly after a few sips?

Read on for the more on last night’s episode.

PHOTOS: The Housewives Hit The Town!

4) Oh, hey Jill. 

5) Alex is a bit pathetic on opening day.  I was really pulling for her to be the level-headed outsider I’ve come to know, but she struck out in scene one.  Hanging on the outskirts of conversations and downing herself in glass after glass of Ramona wasn’t what I was hoping for.  Someone get this woman back to the borough.

6) Ramona’s friend, Joni still hasn’t done much about those oddly-shaped eyebrows.

7)  Ok, let’s get our facts straight.  Contrary to what Jill believes, she wasn’t dumped by Bethenny Frankel.  There was room for you, Jill.  Bethenny did find success and love, but she didn’t intentionally dump you.  Ramona hit the nail on the hit: “Jill did this to herself.”

8) Alex is a model?  Really? *Makes a confused face*

9) So far I like Cindy Barshop.  She seems like a tough broad, and those children are adorable.

10) Brian Farrell is hot.  What the sod is he doing with crazy Sonja?  And why does he look so familiar?

11) LuAnn de Lesseps:”Are you going to take that champagne with you?” Sonja: “Oh no, I’ll get arrested…again.” ZING!

12) Where do we even begin with Ramona?  She’s the boss from hell.  Jill was right on Watch What Happens: Live.  Ramona is mean.  Mean to green young whippets just getting their corporate feet wet.   And Tunisia IS a country, business lady.

13) “I have a skincare line! Tru Renewal!”

14) LuAnn’s boyfriend Jacques is a French Roberto Benigni and such a goober. What? Hey?” And yet, I’m charmed by him.

15) Crankypants Ramona to her Hamptons houseguest (even thought it’s just Alex): “Don’t sit in my seat.  This is my seat.”

16) Crankypants Ramona stirring the pot: “I just can’t wait to see Jill’s face, ’cause she doesn’t know you’re coming.”

17) Oooooh Cindy caught Ramona bad-mouthing her brother, Howie.  And the worst part of it was that Ramona could do nothing to redeem herself. In the future, pull your crew over to the side.   People have ears.  And those ears burn when familiar names are mentioned, duh.

I cannot WAIT for the rest of this season.  I want to see Cindy give it to Ramona good.  I want to see LuAnn go up-and-down on a camel.  I want to see it all!   One thing I don’t want to see is the demise of Alex’s common sense.  Jill came out smelling like roses last night after Alex insisted on getting her story straight.  Who cares?  Jill’s not walking across the bridge in a white dress. Her name is on some committee and she’s choosing to stay out in the Hamptons.  Who cares!  Go find your husband or change out of that ivory dress.  You’re at someone else’s wedding and you’re wearing Ivory.  Take Ramona with you.

Sound off on your favorite moments from last night.  And did you catch Ramon and Jill on Watch What Happens: Live after?  There is no love lost between those two.