That Whole New Image Thing Didn’t Last

August 15th, 2007 // 3 Comments

Because holding babies doesn’t make you any money! Neither does building imaginary halfway houses for female convicts whom she would call the cops on if they came over to see her when they’re out of the joint! Paris and sister Nicky are asking for $500,000 to host a multiple appearance New Year’s Eve party tour in Vegas. The nerve!

A Las Vegas insider said, “Paris and [sister] Nicky are shopping their partying ways to Vegas at the price of around $500,000 – only they have the guts to ask for that amount – for a multiple-day New Year’s Eve bash. Paris will ‘party’ at a few spots and Nicky will bless the lucky host with a fashion show of her wares and model herself.” Our source says only Pure – which is so starved for publicity that it tried to host Lindsay Lohan’s 21st birthday and asked Britney Spears to show up – “may be coming all the way up to the asking price, although [the Hiltons] are so desperate now, they should be paying the clubs for good p.r., not the other way around.”

What are Nicky’s wares? Ceramic ashtrays she made? Macaroni art? Paris’ previous asking price to show up at your club, look around tiredly and leave was $100,000. Wait, didn’t she sell her house? Is it because she can’t get a job? Is she really cut off or something? How does she know to breathe? So many questions. A Hilton rep says that none of this is “accurate”. Which would mean it is.

By J. Harvey
asl

  1. Clementines

    She doesn’t get the whole amount of the house.. she has a morgage and fines to pay off, a down payment on a new house, support to the drug dealers.. and I bet Grandpa really tell her to take a ugly slut hike and out of his sight, and Kathy shut her mouth, shrugged and sadly smiled.

  2. Kelly Rummelhart

    Ewwwww . . . Pauly Shore’s rubbing up on her hip . . . if I were him I’d go get it checked out. Last time I had a pic like this (penis a al thigh) it was Halloween, Castro 1995 . . . ah, good times.

  3. leilah

    Damn, J, you’re on fire today!! (All articles) Is this Olympics-calibre snark the result of a “drought”? If so, ASL should PAY PEOPLE to cock-block……

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