Thanks For The Sperm, Now Step


Bridget Moynahan is not happy with Tom Brady. She just had his kid but chins are wagging that she doesn’t even want to look at him. You know she’s already teaching the kid to say “Gisele’s a whore with scabies”.

“Tom was only allowed to see the baby for a short time,” says a West Coast spy. “Bridget would not see him herself.” Moynahan’s publicist said in a statement: “Bridget is very thankful for a happy baby, excited about being a mother, and very pleased that the father, Tom Brady, was able to be there for the birth.”

But our source says: “He was only allowed to come after the baby was born. The woman would not see him, period. And she gave the baby her last name.”

Supposedly Boston’s Golden Boy is on the hook waiting to hear when he can see his kid again. That’s not right. Yeah, he ruined your life and took up with a supermodel and you’re out a lot of NFL scratch. But you coulda used a pill or something, Gidget. Sorry, I’m in Boston. If we don’t defend Tom Brady, we get shipped out to a New England Patriots re-education camp. You come back as one of those fat guys who paints his gut and dances at Gilette Stadium in 0 degree weather. *shiver*

Tags: Tom Brady