“I Maybe Gittin’ Hitched, Y’all!”

December 17th, 2007 // 12 Comments

Oh god help you. And us. Marrying a dude with several restraining orders against him is not what you need right now, Britney Spears. Nevermind that, he rams into other cars when he gets panicked. I hope the children’s car seats have their own airbags. There’s a scary rumor going around that Britney might be planning to marry her bff Sam lufti in Las Vegas. Sources say she has informed her lawyers and K-Fed. Britney’s last (and definitely not her only) Vegas wedding was terminated after 55 hours in 2004. She married…I don’t know, some clown from her hometown who is probably still getting free Slushies over in Kentwood because he’s “The Guy Who Married Britney Spears Before She Lost The Hot”. Britney’s lawyers have allegedly tried to get her to file a pre-nup to no avail because “Tila Tequila” was on and I’m tryin’ ta watch and how do I git on this show, yo, Tila is hawt! K-Fed is supposedly saying that he doesn’t want his kids near the shadowy Sam lufti and will step up his efforts to keep sole custody. Good idea. The shocker of 2007 is that Kevin Federline started looking like a responsible parent compared to that trampy goofball he mated with.

Photos: INFDaily.com

By J. Harvey
  1. Britney – just stop it. Seriously. It’s not cute. Stop. Now.

  2. Sue

    wow, just what she needs…….lol

  3. Cat

    I guess the only why she’ll stop, as soon everyone stop reading about what she is doing in every step. Becomes a nobody. Thtat only way.

  4. lebear

    Look at her hands…she dyes her hair herself….

  5. snazzygina

    Britney Spears is a meth-head. Period.

  6. she's craazy

    her fingernails have been black for days now……look it up, it’s a side effect of some prescription drugs! her hands are black now! and..hair dye comes with gloves!

  7. ki

    …or she just had on black nailpolish..call me crazy.

  8. NyQuil D

    Awesome! Go Britney Go!

  9. POP

    She really is disgusting looking. Those dyed hands are gross. She doesn’t care at all what she looks like these days, so why did she even bother dying her hair? Or why didn’t she show up at her video looking like this? She knows she will be on all the gossip sites looking a mess when she goes out like this, so apparently she doesn’t care. Or does she? I just don’t get her at all.

  10. mojo

    People listen up! she lives for this sh*t! I am not surprised those dirty, gunky hands is the result of cleaning her own ass with her bare hands!! who I can stand is the paps, gawd..how disgusting can you get?”britneey..you so byootiful*click*britneey look heereee*click*

  11. Applespice

    Wow I hope this isn’t true…

  12. I hope it isn’t true too! Have you seen pictures of this guy Lufti? He’s about the sleaziest looking guy you’ve ever seen. If she marries him, it will be a new low in her downward spiral.

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