Good lord, the reason why Mickey Rourke was so good in “Sin City” was because he wasn’t wearing any makeup. Jesus Pleesuz. Mickey’s crazy punch drunk ass got pinched for DUI this morning on Miami Beach….on a baby blue Vespa. I’d laugh but he might find me and sucker me in the face. It’s like that with him. Mickey was out on the prowl at 2 AM on his putt-putt with some chick.
“They came back out two hours later and crossed Washington Avenue to go to his scooter,” the photographer said. “They both got on it, and he did a U-turn to go north. He was pulled over within a block. “The cop says to him: ‘You swerved right in front of me.’ And Mickey answered: ‘No, no, dude, I’m all right.’”
According to the police report, Rourke asked the cop, “What the f*** did I do?!” Cops say the actor’s “face” was flushed, his eyes were bloodshot and watery and his speech was slurred. “I’m not drunk, I didn’t even drink that much,” Rourke said, according to the report.
Mickey was being held on a 1000 dollar bond. You’d have to drink to be a straight American man on a powder blue Vespa. Damn, that’s not even Britpop. This isn’t Florence. This is Miami, papi, and you’re a drunk hulk on a vagina cycle.