Scarlett Johansson And The Tom Cruise List

June 17th, 2005 // 8 Comments

This is what Page Six is asking today.

WHICH top leading man interviewed three different starlets for the job of girlfriend/future wife before picking his new beloved? “Mark my words: They’ll have a baby,” said our source. “Maybe he or she will be conceived in a petri dish, but they’ll procreate” . . .

Mmm. This is tough. Who could it be?

Well, Radar’s Fresh Intelligence, may lend a clue to this baffling mystery.

Weeks before he began wooing his brainwashed bride-to-be, Cruise made repeated phone calls to the 19-year-old starlet–who was then set to co-star with him in Mission Impossible III–imploring her to meet him at the Scientology Celebrity Center in L.A. But when the actress finally agreed, the supposedly professional get-together took an oddly spiritual turn. “[Cruise] took me into this room, which was stifling hot, and was showing me all kinds of info about joining the church,” Johansson told our source. “The whole time he didn’t even offer me a cookie!” Instead, he offered her dinner–and a glimpse into the Twilight Zone.

After two hours of proselytizing, our source says Cruise opened a door to reveal a second room full of upper-level Scientologists who had been waiting to dine with the pair, at which point the cool-headed ingenue politely excused herself. Soon after the meeting, Johansson dropped out of Mission Impossible III, reportedly due to scheduling conflicts.

This is all very disturbing. Just think Scarlett, you could be engaged right now to Tom Cruise.

I was wondering, what would Lizzie Grubman think of all of this? Well thanks to Gawker, we’ve got our answer.

Gawker: Right, but don’t younger fans see him as a crackpot??Grubman: No, they don’t. And I definitely think they will 100% get married.?Gawker: Gross. Do you think that they’ll sleep in separate beds??Grubman: No, I think they will have hot passionate sex.?Gawker: You are one sick lady.

Can you imagine all the freaky faces Tom would be making during “passionate sex” with Katie? I’m going to have nightmares now.

Just Asking [Page Six]
Cruise Encounters Of The Third Kind [Radar]
IMterview: Lizzie Grubman on the Cruise / Holmes Engagement of Destruction [Gawker]

By Miu von Furstenberg

  1. JStar

    Tom cruise is so fucking weird! He’s a fucking freak with this scientology bullshit! And katie holmes; that girl must just be plain stupid. She is just ghoing to marry him for the simple fact that she can say to herself, “I grew up and married Tom Cruise just like I always used to dream about” What a loser. Seriously, this Hollywood marriage shit has gone too far these past couple years.

  2. Brian

    Oh,God…….first I lost my breakfast… I’ve lost my lunch.
    If I keep reading about this “happy couple” I’m gonna end up skinnier than Lindsey and co.

  3. medea

    I hope they have the best life on Mars,dumb asses

  4. greta

    Lets boycott all news headlines, tv reports, movies etc of these two celebrities. This publicity, fame hungry couple are trying to divert our attention from more important matters that are happening to the world like extreme poverty and war. Makes the two of them a tool of evil, blinding us folks from the truth!

  5. btrue2myself

    They are starting to look alike, she’s gonna turn into the biggest loser being with him.

  6. “You had me at ‘HELLO, I’d like to talk to you about Scientology.’”

  7. vanna

    I applaude Scarlett for taking off in the manner she did.I am sickened by the naiveness and utter stupidity of Katie and her blindness to the move she made and must live with for the rest of her life,literally.Shes sold her soul and her poor baby’s as well.Didnt she know about “shorty” trying to court these other 2?She’s THIRD choice!

  8. may

    …tom cruise is whacked about scientology.. infact scientology is whacked itself.. i think ya’ll should get a life.. and try christianity. i find it funny how tom is lurinng oprah.. jus shows what kind of religion scientology is. oprah will never change and tom will never be normal and kate is just a pile of shit brought to the top by tom. thanks.. i hope they read this cos its all true.

Leave A Comment