Ryan O’Neal Claims It Was The One-Armed Man

Well, he doesn’t really. (And this totally makes me realize that I’ve been particularly prone to lying in my headlines lately, but whatever.)

Explaining why he fired a shot at his son this past weekend, O’Neal claims that he was simply defending himself from a blow from a fireplace poker. Ryan divulged to the L.A. Times that he had been out with a group of friends and his ex, Farrah Fawcett, to celebrate her 60th birthday. He stated that when he arrived at his home in Malibu, his son, Griffin picked up the poker and brandishing it at his father, whom he swiped four or five times. Yahoo! reports:

He “aimed at my head, I ducked, he hit his own girlfriend in the head,” O’Neal, 65, told the newspaper.

“I got a little nervous at that point and fled to my room … and I got my gun,” he said.

O’Neal said his son began to come up the stairs with the poker. “So I just fired it into the banister, and that scared him and he fled,” he said.

Ryan was then arrested for assault with a deadly weapon, but has since been released on bond.

Additionally, TMZ has their hands on the 911 tapes of the call made by JoAnne Berry, Griffin’s girlfriend, to authorities on the night of the scuffle.

My first reaction to all of this is to ask if these maniacs were playing some whacked-out version of “Clue” that I’ve never heard of. Because if so, that’s kind of awesome and I wish I had been invited.