Sadly, my partner in crime, my diva divine, the lovely Nicolette is unable to join me this week, but she’ll be back next week! Last season, the “Snatch Game” was hands-down, the funniest episode of the season. Are our season three queens up to the challenge? Start your engines! As the episode opens, Stacy lets us know how glad and relieved she was that she wasn’t sent packing. She was mad at herself for allowing her to be in the bottom two and feels that “stuff” is knocking her down. Some of the queens are still discussing Manila’s over-the-top Asian reporter from the QNN challenge. Manila tells the guys he was just trying to pay tribute to Margaret Cho, and how she jokes about her Korean mother in her act. Raja thinks the whole discussion is “bulls**t”.
Oooh, you’ve got She Mail! Boy Ru, in a pink suit that actually works for him, enters the room for the mini-challenge, “the new gaming sensation that’s sweeping the nation”, a little game called “S**t RuPaul Says”. The game is simple, a phrase gets spelled out one letter at a time and the queens have to buzz in as soon as they think they know what the phrase is. The last queen standing is the winner and receives a phone call home. When Shangela hears this, he tears up – because he would love to speak with his grandmother, with whom he’s very close. Ru called the first contestants to “swish on down” and play the game, and they all channeled The Price is Right contestants perfectly as they headed toward their buzzers. (I took notes, as I’m going on TPIR in April!) Yara, Delta and Carmen are up first and the category is “S**t RuPaul Eats”. Anyone familiar with the show could see this was “Two piece and a biscuit”, but it took the queens a lot longer than I thought to figure it out. It was Delta for the win. Side note: has Ru ever eaten fried chicken? He’s so skinny! Next up, Mariah, Raja and Manila have to guess “S**t RuPaul Says” – after they all stare at the puzzle with mouths agape, Raja finally guesses “Eleganza Extravaganza”. Last up are Shangela, Alexis and Stacy, trying to guess “S**t RuPaul Plugs” and Shangela gets it – “Available on iTunes”. In the finals, it’s Raja, Delta and Shangela and they have to guess “Ghetto S**t RuPaul Says”. It’s a toughie, even I, one of Ru’s biggest fans, was lost. Delta got it – “She done already done had herses” Say what? So, Delta was the big winner and got the phone call home.
Check out more of our “Ru-cap” – including videos – after the jump!
Ru tells the queens that this week’s main challenge is the eagerly awaited (by me, at least) Snatch Game, where the queens get to show off their best celebrity impersonations. As the gals scramble to get their looks ready, Delta pulls Shangela aside and offers him the phone call home. Awww! Love you, Delta! Mariah, despite not ever having done a celebrity impersonation before, thinks he’s going to nail Joan Crawford. Stacy debates between Anna Nicole Smith and Fran Drescher. Shangela is doing my idol, Tina Turner and Alexis is doing Alicia Keys. Stacy ends up picking Anna Nicole strictly on the basis that they both like pink. I’m not getting a good feeling about this…
Alexis is trying to figure out how to make Alicia Keys funny. Manila decides to do Imelda Marcos, much to Raja’s delight. Despite all of the ongoing buzz surrounding last week’s interview, Manila wants to step out on a limb and show off his “Pilipino Pride”. Ru comes in to check on the queens’ progress. Delta is doing Cher. Ru says Cher’s a big fan of the show and will most likely be watching…no pressure! Raja is doing Tyra Banks, which is to his advantage since he’s worked with her on America’s Next Top Model. Yara is doing Amy Winehouse. Yes, a Puerto Rican Brit. Thankfullly, Yara’s been watching “Hatty Potter” and thinks he’s got a pretty good British accent working. It’s not working, but it’s hilarious! Carmen is doing Jennifer Lopez and has gone a little…ummm… overboard with the booty pads. Ru reminds him he’s sitting behind a desk. Alexis tells Ru he’s going to be a pregnant, butch Alicia Keys. I can’t wait to see that! Ru isn’t confident that Stacy can do a convincing Anna Nicole and is growing visibly weary with hearing Stacy promise that she’s going to bring everything she has to the performance. Mariah insists he is Joan Crawford.
Ru informs the queens that the contestants for the Snatch Game are Amber Rose and Aisha Tyler – and they’re also the guest judges. Stacy’s hit her lowest point and seems ready to quit. Shangela reminds Stacy that Ru’s just trying to help and tells her she should go with another impersonation. Stacy suggests that maybe she do a Mo’Nique impersonation – which is perfect! Why didn’t he think of that before?
It’s time for the Snatch Game! Delta’s playing a surprisingly low-key Cher. Manila, who I don’t believe knows the meaning of “low key” does a hilarious take on Imelda. Shangela sighs and says “At least she picked a Pilipino.” Raja has Tyra’s crazy eyes down pat. She’s just smiling with her eyes, or “smizing” (Raja’s cracking me up!) Why Stacy didn’t go with Mo’ Nique from the start is beyond me. She is PERFECT! I also love Shangie’s Tina Turner. Mariah’s Joan Crawford face is truly terrifying. Alexis did look just like Alicia and was pretty damn funny. Carmen made sure to show off her padded caboose when it was her turn to shine. Yara’s Amy Winehouse is as amusing of a train wreck as the real one is! Check out the first round here:
Amber Rose’s question was, “Psycho Sally is so psycho, instead of kissing her dates goodnight, she [blanks] them.” Amber said “stabs”. The queens aren’t matching, but who really cares? They’re funny! Aisha doesn’t think Mariah’s giving enough Joan Crawford intensity. Butch Alicia tries to give Amber her phone number in lieu of an answer. The next question is “Freaky Fanny is so freaky, instead of shaking hands, she shakes…” Aisha offers the response “Schlongs”. The queens gamely play along, but right about now, I’m definitely missing Carol Channing (as played by the fabulous Pandora Boxx – hi, Pandora!) Stacy’s Mo’Nique is killing it though. Ru checks in on Tyra, who apparently has “smized” so hard that she’s now bleeding from the eyes (ha!) The last question of the game was, “Dirty Diana is so dirty, she washes her weave with…” Amber replied “Lysol”. Manila said “the sweat from my feet…because I wear a lot of shoes!” She’s a scream. Manila thinks Shangela’s Tina is the worst impersonation he’s ever seen. I disagree. If we’re going for accuracy and not playing up the “character”, Manila would be just as guilty of a “bad” impression here. I’m just saying. Alicia keeps the phone number gag going with Amber and when it comes to her answer, she wrote down “dush” – which apparently is the hood spelling of “douche”. According to Ru, the winner of the Snatch Game was “Who cares?” but I think it was us at home for sure!
The next day, the queens get ready to show off their favorite, fiercest drag wear on the runway, but Carmen notes that not all of the queens are feeling so confident. Stacy and Shangela continue to bond, as you can see in this clip:
It’s runway time and Ru looks fab (as always). I guess gentlemen do prefer blondes! Damn! Santino’s back, he’s had plenty of time to charge up the old mean-o-meter. Besides wearing clothing of questionable taste and hanging with Kayne West, what exactly is Amber Rose famous for? Aisha Tyler, on the other hand, is awesome (if you’re not watching Archer, you’re missing out on her funniest stuff!) The gals hit the stage! Yara Sofia (those eyes! I must get me some of those contacts) rocks dreadlocks and a black and white skintight latex gown. Yara (sort of obviously) says he loves the “dark, wicked bitch look” Aisha calls it “Gaga Gautier”. Shangela has her first misstep of the season in a Kentucky Derby-big hair hat and a dress that reminded me of the one Divine wore in Female Trouble. Do not want. Mariah showcases the gams in a black mini-dress with a feathered top and a great wig. Raja continues to amaze. He’s like a walking Benetton ad or something Zulu warrior and killer boots. He calls his look “National Geographic drag”. Initially I wasn’t fond of this but on repeated viewings, it kind of grew on me. Alexis goes full quinceañera in another (what I’m assuming is a) pageant gown. Carmen serves glamor with a chiffon accented bathing suit. Stacy models her “signature piece”, a full length gold lame jacket. Not my favorite Stacy look. It’s more “drag queen on the go” than I’d like. I’m also not crazy about Delta’s jumpsuit. I hate jumpsuits in general though – I adore Delta with red hair though! Manila is really showing “Pilipino Pride” this week, modeling a sequined mini-dress boasting the colors of the Philippine flag. Ru calls out Raja, Stacy, Alexis, as the top three. Yara, Delta and Mariah are the bottom three. Not my Delta! Ru tells Carmen, Shangela and Manila to make bolder choices going forward and sends them back to the Interior Illusions Lounge for some fine Absoult cocktails.
Raja gets props for her runway look (even Santino was complimentary…what what?) Michelle (rocking the Betty Page bangs, by the way) thought he could have been even bolder with his Tyra impersonation because he knew what a “human caricature” she really is. Alexis’ Alicia Keys was well-received by the judges, especially Amber, who said “I love gaudy things” Really? I never would have known! The flirting didn’t hurt either. Everyone loved Stacy’s Mo’Nique. Michelle was so glad she stepped it up. Yara got compliments on her runway look but no one could understand her weird accent as Amy Winehouse. Mariah was surprised she was in the bottom three and thought Carmen should be in the bottom three in her place because “she just played a bitchy version of herself”. Me-ow! Ru was disappointed that Mariah missed a lot of opportunities to be funny in the Snatch Game. Delta was criticized for being a “shy Cher” – but he acknowledged the fact that he didn’t amp up his portrayal enough. The judges continued to deliberate. Michelle needs more screen time. Not only did she say that Alexis seemed to be “stuck”, she got the line of the night in about Stacy’s pants choice, saying “She’s hanging with her besties – Polly and Esther”. Ha! Yara’s runway look appears to have saved her from lip syncing and Mariah’s makeup was more Lily Munster than Joan Crawford. Ru has made her decision!
The big winner tonight is Stacy! Yay! Finally! She wins a cruise – it’s been a big couple of weeks for him. Coming to Hollywood to film the show was his first plane trip and now he’s off on his first cruise! Bad news however – from here on out the challenge winners no longer receive immunity. No more immunity though! Uh-oh. Not surprising, Mariah and Delta must lip sync for their lives. Not my Delta! Although, as much as I was sad she was here, at least the world gets to see her perform. The song this week is “Looking for a New Love” by Jody Watley (love this song!) and Delta does not disappoint. She makes it look so easy. Mariah, not so much, she doesn’t know the words and it’s really obvious. Ru’s choice is pretty obvious too, Delta – shante you stay! Mariah must sashay away. I thought Mariah was going to go further, she is a gorgeous queen. (But every week, I feel bad when a queen leaves – I love them all!) See y’all next week – until then, can I get an Amen?
Don’t miss the eleganza extravaganza! Catch all-new episodes of RuPaul’s Drag Race Monday nights at 10pm EST on Logo!