Rumer Willis Is One Stoned Pigeon

March 22nd, 2007 // 75 Comments

Rumer is all done up on the weed, and loving life. Good for her. It’s gotta be hard to have two very good-looking movie stars for parents, and look like a normal chick. Seriously, if I was watching Charlie’s Angel’s 2 and saw my Mom coming out of the ocean at age 40 in a bikini looking that hot, I’d cash in my chips and move into a damn bell tower. Demi gives ME a boner, and I’m strictly dickly.

That’s some good shit. Check out the Matrix action and the smoke rings she and her gal pal are trying to blow after the jump. PARTY!

By J. Harvey

  1. -A

    Why call her Rumer. Let’s call her what she is. The Original Shiloh.

  2. Kourtni

    Is that a condom water balloon I spot with my little eye?

  3. MJK


    You called it.

    You are looking at watered down pics of the Jolie-Pitt kids in 11/12 years.

  4. Draya

    Poor Rumer. Apparently, Dad and Mom are too busy to warn Rumer about hooking up with loser friends who will sell her pics to the papparazzi. She’s a dye & nose job away from being Parasite Hilton.

  5. cyndi

    i can only wonder are they used, or did they use them afterward, or did they not know how to use them. i dont know which would scare me more.

  6. Tine

    None of Demi’s kids are cute! Maybe the youngest one – but she always looks kind of evil to me. The two older ones look like their faces have been painted on eggs.

  7. heama603

    J. Your fuckin funny man. your the reason I come here man. hahahahahahahahaha.

  8. Here’s the next La Lohan, Hilton, Richie trash. Why we called them celebrities is beyond me, buy Rumour has joined the band wagon. Oh Sh@@t!
    Can’t papa kutcher do some thing?

  9. Sassafrassy

    Anyone else think it’s crazy that she has a tattoo on her hand at age 15?!

  10. HappyMamatoThree

    Wonder if she’s grounded now that the pictures are public? And couldn’t she afford a better hotel room?


  11. Kay

    Rumer is 18 years old. She is an adult.

  12. Wendy

    Am I the only one who’s waiting for the Rumer/Ashton photos to be made public, a la Woody and Soon Yi? (Rumer is closer in age to Ashton than her mother is!)

  13. racergirl

    While I too am all about the “dickly,” I see nothing wrong with this Rumer. I find her quite striking, and she seems to be having quite a lark with her mates. Odd that the photos are public, but that might be on purpose, yeah?

    No matter, Rumer. You’re a lovely girl. Never mind those that say otherwise.

  14. she looks like one of the incredibles

  15. KFed

    WOOOO PAR-TAY! Thats the way to do it!!! Refrigerator

  16. KFed

    WOOOO PAR-TAY! Thats the way to do it!!! Refrigerator

  17. sandy

    Sorry but I don’t think Bruce Willis is handsome. He has a birdbeak nose and very receding hairline.

    You are still the funniest guy on the sites J-Harv. Love ya.

  18. Loob

    “Demi gives ME a boner, and I’m strictly dickly”

    Heheh! Well, she is pretty darn masculine.

    And Rumer did unfortunately get her Dad’s nose.
    And Andre the Giant’s chin. Or you know, someone else huge’s chin.

  19. huh

    I don’t think ANY of Demi Moore’s girls are really attractive. They’re regular, with the 2 younger ones bordering on ugly.

    This girl has already picked up the nasty habit of smoking, and you know where that leads to–harder drugs almost every time. Unfortunately. What great values have they implanted into their children to save them from the lures of Hollywood? Academics? Religion? Service?

    I don’t think so.

    Angelina Jolie, hate her as you may, will implant the value of an education, empathy and charity into her children. Wait and see.

  20. BS

    “Angelina Jolie, hate her as you may, will implant the value of an education, empathy and charity into her children. Wait and see.”


    Complete BULLSHIT! The Jolie-Pitt kids are going to put today’s spoiled fck ups to SHAME!

    The lucky ones will kill themselves, the unlucky ones will fight a life long battle with drugs, booze, sex and mental illness….

  21. Mon

    She’s just bitter that her old-ass mom stole step-daddy Kutcher.

  22. Izzy

    Soon all of Demi’s kids will begin to have plastic surgery, just as their mom has done. And we will all marvel at how “beautiful” those girls turned out.

  23. huh

    Jolie’s kids will be great. Wait and see. Because she experienced so much pain as a young girl/woman and because she has such a love for children, she is already ahead of the game. She’s not selfish. Her kids will get her love and her attention. They’ll be wonderful humans beings. Mark my words.

  24. Lori

    I would probably feel like crap if I were Rumor considering all of her boyfriends probably date her just to get closer to her mom. Her girl-friends probably want to bang her dad and her step dad. Bruce Willis was hot in pulp fiction and who wouldn’t want to be “punked” by Ashton. Please punk me. Soon Rumor will be hanging with Lindsay Lohan in rehab with a shaved head, holding onto Paris Hilton’s dog Tinkerbell wondering how she can get to the nearest Taco Bell. Coming to a theatre near you.

  25. I seriously think that the Jolie-Pitt kids will turn out to be bright and caring people in the future. They are being brought up with great values, and will most likely follow Angelina’s footsteps. As for Rumer, who am I to judge her? Who are WE to judge her? I’m not trying to say that what she is doing is not wrong, I just don’t think we have the right to point fingers at anyone; no matter what their backgrounds are, famous or not. Yes, she’s rich, famous, and gets whatever she wants, but you don’t know her, or the life that she lives. Unless you are her, you don’t know what she goes through everyday, and it’s at times like these, when people are so judgemental of each other that I remember something I once heard: live and let live. Live your own lifes, and let the poor girl and her parents live theirs. Stop trying to look over other people’s lifes and making judgements based on what they do; instead revise your own existance and unless that’s already perfect mind your own nose.

  26. Lori

    I think MargieMarie is taking our comments way too seriously. It’s all said in jest. Obviously none of us bloggers really know them. We are just commenting on what we see. I see it this way, it’s like being at the checkout and seeing the National Enquirer. If you don’t agree with the headlines, don’t buy the mag. If you don’t like funny or sarcastic comments, go to a different website. You are defending people that would discard you in a ny minute in public. Everyone is under a microscope Margie, whether it’s a controlling boss, a nosey neighbor, the guy that serves you your latte, your hubby. They are all judging you secretly one way or the other. To say you never pass judgement is hypocritical-it’s human nature. Go have some oreo’s and calm down. It will all be ok.

  27. it'safamiliarscene

    Not a good, wholesome party. More like a bunch of familiar kids hanging out at someone’s apartment to get high and/or have sex. The girls look pretty unattractive. They’re not dressed up and wearing makeup to attract new boyfriends. They don’t care. They know each other well, I’ll bet.

  28. Tara jensen

    She is with Ben Dreyfuss, Richard’s soon in the photo with the wierd condom and boy

  29. Nurse Betty

    You won’t catch Paris and Lindsay running around with Rumer for long because Rumer is not pretty or fashionable. More like a tomboy. She doesn’t fit in with Paris’s crowd. Rumer hangs with the nobodies–They’re not good-looking–they’re from troubled homes with broken marriages. Richard Dreyfuss had a lot of problems with substances. Hope his boy isn’t following in his footsteps.

  30. Dee

    That guy is certainly not handsome. Look at his nose. It’s curved like a bird’s beak.

    Does anyone know what kind of goofy game they playing with that condom? Why is his hand on his forehead and his face contorted like that? Creepy.

  31. sweetie

    Sorry. Rumer is no more than 16. She is not 18. Look it up.

  32. sobstory

    If Rumer is only 16, that makes things even worse! She’s getting an early start!

  33. Miles

    Rumer will be 19 this August.

    Good ‘ol Wikipedia.

  34. althena

    I think rumor has her daddys Jawls and her mamas eyes she sure as hell aint got mama’s body *fracturing the english so all can understand*

    as for the Jolie/Pitt kids they are going to be like friggin royalty just wait she dote on them till shes in her grave they will have everything they could ever ask for….
    then when the time comes the kids’ friends will be comming around to “bang mom and get punked by dad” brad pitt makes my teeth sweat….and if i was into girls Ang would “give me a boner”

  35. Lost Something In Translation

    Hey, what about Demi’s oldest son?

    The tall one who’s on “That 70′s Show”?

    What’s his name…..

  36. Laura

    What’s all the fuss about? So the girl got together with some friends and they got high and shot stupid pictures. Ooooh! That certainly means she’ll be an addict and will try to kill herself several times and end up like effin Britney Speras, right? Gimme a break!

  37. I’m guessing they were just trying to reenact that scene from Lady and the Tramp, and they didn’t have a strand of spaghetti.

  38. Isn’t it about time these rich BRATS get REAL JOBS? or at least do some good in the world? Let’s see some pictures of these Hollywood Spoiled Brats working with the poor or/and Elderly……Or even going to different countries and adopting unfortunate children.

    Cheers. Val

  39. Rumer is proof that beautiful people can still have ugly kids.

  40. jailynn

    The pictures are from facebook, she’s a college student. If she has a facebook account, she obviously doesn’t care if people see the pictures. And since she attends USC according to that facebook, then she’s of age.

  41. Francesca

    I don’t understand why Bruce and Demi wouldn’t have better looking kids.

  42. Francesca

    Since you guys brought up Angelina, anyone concerned with the reverse racism Jolie shows her biological daughter, aka “the blob”? I hate this idea that you have to suffer and be oppressed to be valid and worthy of attention.

  43. Laura

    Oh, yes, Valerie… why doesn’t this 18 year old girl adopt some unfortunate kids from Africa? I was wondering the exact same thing myself… *eyeroll*

  44. Renazzle

    About Angelina Jolie’s daughter. Why would she name her SHILOH PITT??

    Shiloh Pitt
    Pile O’Shit

    That kid is going to go hate that name when she hits middle school.

  45. Joe

    Why do famous people have such a problem with people taking pictures. why not just go about your affairs and ignore the papparazzi? So what if they make a buck off your picture, your famous and probably making more per minute than the papparazzi are per day.

  46. ArchGoodwin

    Why does everybody think Demi’s surgical changes will be passed on genetically to her kid? Think she hasn’t had facial work done?

  47. acemalone

    Yawn. Bratty rich kids getting stoned. How exciting.

  48. GamblinMan

    “Francesca said:
    . . . anyone concerned with the reverse racism Jolie shows her biological daughter, aka “the blob”? ”

    What would you expect from a woman who wears a vial of blood around her neck? That family is already dysfunctional, say what you will about Angie being compassionate and so on. Hopefully Shiloh doesn’t commit suicide as a teen when she reads all the news articles about how her mom didn’t connect with her and that she’s a ‘blob.’ At least her daddy seems to care about her . . .

  49. Poor Rumer. She’s as lucky as Alexa Rae. Alexa got her daddy’s looks and her mom’s voice. Ride Lo

  50. yowsers

    interesting all those submissive signals she’s flashing in that pic (the pose, the shoulder hunch, the lowered head + upward look, the wrist flashes…)

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