Rosie Fights With Hog Owner

So Rosie and her woman were in South Beach. And some guy with a motorcyle gave them a heap of shit because he thought Rosie touched his bike. You know, blogging disaster happens when you meet a celeb and they’re wicked nice. Then you feel a sort of twinge of guilt when you write smack about them. Kinda like when Buffalo Bill refers to Catherine Martin as “it” when he has her in the hole. He has to depersonalize her ass so he can wear her tits later. So what I’ve learned from this is that bloggers operate much like serial killers. It’s been an eye opener! Anyway, Rosie got called a “fucking lesbian” by some douche. She wrote about it in that irritating verse way on her blog.

as i buckled my belt
he ran towards r car

“chill dude -
we didn’t touch it”
his eyes were wild
stretched open wide

he got madder
pupils big – snorting like a dragon
he screamed

the trump card

and we r supposed to cower
to fall 2 r knees ashamed
not good enough

not tonight
mr bald muscle man
with a pimped out hog
not tonight

i stood up in the front seat
hands above my head
smiled and yelled

God, I wish she’d just write in the old-fashioned declarative sentence way. See, that’s the worst I can say about her. I’ve lost my f*cking sociopathic tendencies when it comes to this one. Because she had a do-rag on, and she was burly and nice, and took a picture with me. Worst blogger ever. I’m such a slut.