I’ve got to tell you-I was agitated by the time minute 89 rolled around last night. Three collective hours of The Real Housewives Of New York City spread out over two weeks was far too much for even the most devoted of fans to take. Even Andy Cohen looked a little winded (BTW, we don’t sympathize with you. This is all your fault). No one came out looking like a champion. Not even Cindy Barshop, who barely made a peep the entire time, came up smelling like roses. She’s as frosty and moody as the others are gossipy and maniacal.
The rotten apple award goes to Kelly Killloren Bensimon, who claimed last week that she was voted one of Cosmopolitan Magazine’s “Nicest People.” Cosmo should strip you of that win, Bensimon. For you were the bitchiest, most immature, most condescending of the group last night. You were worse than Regina George.
Yes, Alex McCord is odd…and not in a good, “Phoebe Buffay“ sort of way. However, that does not give Bensimon the license to incessantly make fun of her and drop obnoxiously snotty remarks here and there while McCord talks. Saying something cruel about someone to their face is just as bad as talking about them behind their back. So Bensimon, don’t think you’re doing anyone a favor by being outright mean to them. You think you’re so clever and almighty because you married up and scored big in the gene pool. Let me tell you something-You’re not nice. Cosmo most likely rated you based on your popularity within the confines of Manhattan and who you know. You are probably nice to people who intimidate you, which is why you don’t say a word to Jill Zarin or LuAnn de Lesseps. They are scary. Alex is odd, and while she might have a great vocab, you sense weakness and so you strike. A good person doesn’t do that.
I can’t even remember what the others said because I was so wrapped up in Bensimon’s piss-poor behavior. LuAnn is passive-aggressive, Jill can’t seem to get her stories straight, and Ramona Singer only knows how to defend herself by striking back at her opponent head-on.
Bitches, your 15 minutes are up. Time to go back to the social circles down in fraggle rock from whence you came. I have never been so glad to return to scripted television. Friday Night Lights and Netflix have joined forces to save my life. Share your own thoughts on last night’s reunion (part II) by tweeting us at @socialitelife or head on over to our Facebook page.
THANK GOD THIS SEASON IS OVER.