Prince William’s Single

April 16th, 2007 // 4 Comments

(WENN)

Is this cuz’ she saw the photo of him with his hand latched onto that chick’s boob? Prince William and his longtime chick Kate Middleton have ended it.

The breakup was “amicable,” according to a friend of the couple.

The prince, 24, and Middleton, 25, have been dating for nearly five years, after meeting at St. Andrews University in Scotland.

A spokesman at the prince’s office at Clarence House says they will not be commenting. “We don’t comment on Prince William’s private life,” the rep says. Britain’s The Sun newspaper first reported Saturday that the pair had reached an “amicable agreement” to separate.

The pair are said to have grown increasingly independent of each other since their university days. William is currently taking an armored corps commander course in Dorset, around 125 miles west of London, and it has kept him from Middleton and her new life in London.

Apparently she was having a lot of trouble dealing with the pressures of being the prince’s ladyfriend. And apparently he realized he was a prince and could land any chick he wanted and was all “jesus christ, why aren’t I nailing everything that walks like my randy redheaded sexual dynamo brother? Why do I have to be the stoic pasty one? I’m hot, too! I’m a friggin’ prince, damnit! This nation is mine if several people die! I should go after Jordan!”

By J. Harvey
asl

  1. Eww Jordan?!

    Yeah right!

    Grossness.

    Later,
    Tom

  2. T-Bone

    Personally speaking, I can’t even believe that monarchies still exist! Classist snobs! It’s time for Democracy to prevail globally. Democracy isn’t perfect, but it’s the best way.

  3. MikEM

    poor wills…just a cute kid in a gilded cage with a spotlight on it.

  4. L

    i wonder if i will always start my comment with a :
    J HARVEY YOU FUNNY I LOVE YOU!!!

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