Paris To Teach Class

June 25th, 2007 // 26 Comments

(Flynet)

Which is a damn oxymoron! The Learning Annex has offered Paris Hilton a gig teaching a course called “How To Build Your Brand”. I can think of several other things she is way more qualified to teach but this is a family website. Ok, no it isn’t – she could teach people how to juggle penis and answering the cell phone at the same time or how to make sure the cleaning lady gets the wet spot off her comforter and maybe an anatomy course on how far a human being can get their legs behind their head.

Paris Hilton has been offered big bucks to speak at the The Learning Annex Real Estate and Wealth Expos in Seattle, Chicago, New York and Boston. The soon-to-be-free heiress has been offered one million buckaroos to teach a one-hour class on “How to Build Your Brand.” Get your product advice from the expertise of the socialite, reality TV star, sex tape star victim, paparazzi princess, nightclub entrepreneur convict!

Paris once told Newsweek, “I consider myself a businesswoman and a brand.” The Learning Annex President and Founder Bill Zanker believes “Paris Hilton is a brilliant entrepreneur who has built an incredible brand.”

More like sex tape aggressor who knew exactly what she was doing. Boston? Did they say Boston? Oh I am so up in there if I can get my publisher to pay for it. Though I don’t know if she’ll be able to teach over my laughter.

By J. Harvey
  1. DollyMama

    This new color is hard to read–please go back to the old format!

  2. Lauren

    You guys are killing me with the background color today. Very hard to pass off neon orange and pink as work-related.

  3. nane

    Just heard the news…. Paris is free!

  4. Joe Mahma

    HAHAHAHA

    Step 1) Be a super-rich heiress.

    Step 2) Get a reality show on MTV.

    Step 3) Release sextapes in regular intervals.

    Sounds easy…

  5. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  6. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  7. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  8. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  9. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  10. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  11. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  12. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  13. pminfo

    And Donald Trump is her agent and he does the same gig. Duh.

  14. Why_do_I_care?

    Yep. Hating the new colors. Sorry.

  15. sassymommy

    Please, for the love of GOD, stop with the red and green! I literally can not read it without pain.

  16. BK

    This site is now almost impossible to read.

  17. Sassafrassy

    I hate the new background. Anybody else?

  18. Tonysgirl

    Pleaaasssseee this color is hard on the eyes, gives me a headache!!!

  19. Tonysgirl

    Pleaaasssseee this color is hard on the eyes, gives me a headache!!!

  20. msd

    The new background is literally migraine-inducing. I am nauseous and will have to quit visiting the site if it doesn’t change. Hey–what was wrong with the quiet, creamy, classy background?

  21. Karra

    I have to say, I think the background colors are really cute… but, they’re definitely not very user friendly. They really hurt my eyes (after like 10 minutes of reading), and they’re really obvious for someone trying to read the site while at work.

    I actually appreciated that this site looked a lot better than any of the other Gossip sites before.

  22. parisfan4life

    New!! Paris Hilton out of jail first video.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pd2MCCnl4LY

  23. chewey

    my eyes! oh, god, my eyes! the new color scheme sucks.

  24. Boo!

    Ack! Neon boo!

    YOU, ASL, can laugh at Paris all you want, but it is just so foolish, (stating the obvious, here). You have made how much money off of photos and gossip over her? STFU!

    Gawd, can you bloggers and loZers get with it, she is the one that is wealthy, how much does it HURT to see someone that is a millionaire at 26 years-old?

    All of you I mean every single person that bashes her should STFU, it is all of the people that make hits on these blogs that has only helped her ‘brand’.

    Good luck getting the money for a flight to Boston and a place in the class. I can forsee now that the classes will definitely be filled to capacity.

    And stop spamming asshat “pminfo”.

  25. Zekers

    Um, yeah, the new background is ridiculously bright-OOUUCCHH!

    I don’t know of one person that would pay money to go listen to her talk. I don’t know of one person who would go listen to her talk-for free! There is nothing she could possibly say that I would find enlightening. She is where (and what) she is because she came from money. This is not “bashing,” this is a simple fact.
    Anyway, Boo go back to bed and get up on the other side. Maybe Paris will send you some free tickets and she can help you work on that disposition!

  26. Rachel

    Ah, it’s only temporary people. Look at the message in the sidebar.

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