Paris Hilton Is A Terrible Singer

She’s right up there with Jennifer Lopez in vocal quality. Listen to Paris sing (you know you want to) the future classics “Screwed,” “Don’t Touch It,” “Hand On My Heart,” and “Sooner or Later.”

Paris Whitney Hilton, a sucessful model, actress, designer, and now musician, is thrilled to release her debut album “1 Crazy Party” on her very own label, Heiress Records. Ms. Hilton’s first single “Turn It Up” is a sassy slice of electro pop that will no doubt reach the number one spot on charts all around the globe. Paris has worked with world famous producers and writers over the last year, and has produced one of those “must hear” records where every song is a hit. “I wanted to record something personal, something that has meaning to me, and I think this CD will show my fans that I value them and that singing has always been one of my huge passions,” says the socialite herself. The album will also feature the smash hit “Screwed,” “All the Boys Are Chasing Me,” and “9 Times out of 10.”

Lyrically, this is cutting edge stuff. Bestow this woman with endless Grammy’s.

UPDATE: Apparently the site is a fake. So I guess we’ll have to hold off the Paris singing bashing until later.