Paris Hilton Feels Horrible About Cell Phone Mishap

Paris finally speaks out about cell phone hacking. Here’s a guide to what she really was saying.

In an interview with Us Weekly magazine, on newsstands Friday, Hilton says: “I feel horrible that, once again, someone has invaded my privacy. I want to apologize to all my friends and family. I don’t know why this stuff always happens to me, but I wish it wouldn’t anymore.”

Translation: I should have hacked myself. The free publicity is better than another sex tape.

Hilton, 24, first heard the news from her sister, Nicky. “(Nicky) told me it was out there. It’s too upsetting for me — I can’t believe it.”

Translation: Why did I have to hear this from my bitch of a sister?

Some of Hilton’s friends have been besieged with calls and e-mails. Actress Lindsay Lohan tells the magazine: “It’s crazy. I even got an e-mail from someone pretending to be Hugh Hefner.”

Translation: I didn’t realize it wasn’t Hugh Hefner until the pot and booze wore off.

[via AP]