Paris Hilton Wants You to Buy Champagne in a Can

December 12th, 2007 // 9 Comments

Want to make something look less cheap? Well, why not just dip it in gold paint. At least, that’s what Paris Hilton has done. She also looks as if she’s dragging herself across the desert and not to remedy an itch, as was my first guess. It’s all in the name of promoting yet another product that she’s marketing toward any fool with the money and lack of common sense to buy anything this woman’s selling. Appropriately enough, the item Paris is hyping this time is her line of canned champagne, Rich Prosecco. You read that correctly, canned champagne. Who the hell wants to drink champagne out of a can? But I guess it makes sense that Paris would be marketing it, since she is the human embodiment of what the product is–an attempt to make something that should be “classy” easily accessible for the masses to consume. I’m betting that if you look closely, you’ll see that she also fizzes a little when you pull her tab open.

Photos: WENN

6 more photos of Paris Hilton holding a press conference to promote Rich Prosecco at Solar Club in Berlin are after the jump.

(Hint – Right-click on the image thumbnails with your mouse to open them in a new tab or window.)

Photos: WENN

By Lisa Timmons
  1. Cat

    Well…where is Bond, Jame Bond??

  2. Alexis

    Maybe it’s not quite as ridiculous as Coppola’s canned sparkler (which bears his daughter’s name). That little pink delight comes with a straw to complete the full “I’m a prissy douche with an undiscerning palate” effect.

  3. stolidog

    Clearly, one of your best….

    “I’m betting that if you look closely, you’ll see that she also fizzes a little when you pull her tab open”

    by the way, for god’s sake, don’t look too closely…shudder.

  4. It’s actually smart to start canning beverages like wine, beer, and champagne. New linings in the cans prevent erosion to the cans, and no light being let in protects it and it’s taste from UV lights. It’s just snobs and morons who think it isn’t classy to drink it out of such a vulgarity like a can. But in reality it’s one of the ideal conditions for a solid product. But you will have the purists argue over cork taste and blah blah blah.

    But if they wanted to take this product seriously, it isn’t the canning. Its the fact that they picked the cheapest and dirtiest whore from Hollywood to pimp it.

  5. Cali

    wow, the fake heiress would endorse anything for a few bob (shaking my head in disbelief)…..

  6. BOTTOMLESS HOLE

    Look, I like champagne no matter where it comes from (well…….) However, I would NOT buy Paris’ champagne for anything. Sofia Coppola has a great one that I drink whenever I go somewhere where a celebration is in order, but a bottle would be too cumbersome. Don’t knock it until you have tried it!

  7. Zelda F.

    Forget about the champagne, she looks like a freaking lizard creature from outer space in that photo!!! Not at all flattering. It makes her legs look waaaaay too short for her cold, slithery, scaley body.

  8. NYCgirrl

    An absolutely fab idea! Whichever firm mass distributes this little baby will make gazillions. Mark my words. To to snobby media heads who will laugh derisively at this: Keep giggling. I’ll be buying up all the stock of Anheusser-Busch or some such. Think: weekends at the office, summers at the beach, afternoon matinees, warm weather drive-ins, dinner theatre, urban motoring fare…sneak-treats.

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