Paris Hilton Threatening Us All

They need to put some sort of birth control in the LA water supply to prevent this terror from ever happening. Paris Hilton says she’s shooting for a baby in 2009. I apologize to anyone trying to get pregnant in the Los Angeles area, but this is a national health issue. A baby is not going to come out of that woman. It’s going to be a giant STD blob which will eat cities.

Paris Hilton told Heat magazine that she’s so in love with her boyfriend Igor, I mean Benji Madden, that she plans to have his baby. Oh jesus no. They’ve been dating for three months.

“I do want a baby. Pretty soon. Not yet because I’m so busy, but next year,” she says.

Benji’s brother Joel just had a baby with his girlfriend and Paris’ best friend, Nicole Richie. If this is some sort of keeping up with the Jones type thing, we need to file an injunction against this stupidity. Now.

Photos: WENN

See more photos of wannabe mommy Paris Hilton after the jump.

Photos: WENN