Oprah Reunites Former Rivals To Toast The Daytime Queen

What a cruel, cruel, cruel…and amazingly brilliant idea. Oprah Winfrey – sometimes referred to as God by a fair majority of housewives and home-bound invalids – has reunited several of her former competitors in the daytime talk circuit, dusting them off and bringing them out of retirement for a show all about their years on the air.

As you can see from the picture above, Sally Jesse Raphael is looking sloshed, Geraldo Rivera doesn’t want to get too close to svelte Ricki Lake, Phil Donahue has lost his mind and Montel Williams…well, he’s lucky anyone even considers him a talk show host. Two questions:

  1. Where is Maury Povich?
  2. Where is Rolanda Watts?

Ah…we just got word Maury couldn’t make it. Apparently he’s so short staffed that he’s processing all of the paternity tests himself these days at home with Connie Chung’s help. And consider this my APB on Rolanda…

Yes, I just threw that much 90s trivia at you in one post. You loved it. Can’t handle it? Charles Perez. (slams the mic on the ground).