O.J. Has Balls, Even For A Psychopathic Killer

June 19th, 2007 // 15 Comments

Multiple murderer O.J. Simpson had a book and television deal underway in Nov. 2006 for a tome he penned called “If I Did It”, which purported to tell HIS theory on who who killed his ex-wife Nicole and waiter Ron Goldman. Yeah, breathe slowly in through your nose and out through your mouth to deal with the nausea. Only in America can you almost make bank off having slaughtered a couple of people – one of them being the mother of your children. Anyway, that got the kibosh when someone with taste stepped in. TMZ has gotten ahold of the manuscript and it’s about as vomitous you would think a memoir by someone who got away with double murder and is trying to cast himself as the hero would be.

I’m going to tell you a story you’ve never heard before, because no one knows this story the way I know it. It takes place on the night June 12, 1994, and it concerns the murder of my ex-wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her young friend, Ronald Goldman. I want you to forget everything you think you know about that night because I know the facts better than anyone. I know the players. I’ve seen the evidence. I’ve heard the theories. And, of course, I’ve read all the stories: That I did it. That I did it but I don’t know I did it. That I can no longer tell fact from fiction. That I wake up in the middle of the night, consumed by guilt, screaming.

Is that a confession? America? America. Keep reading for the part where he’s covered in blood which I’m sure is supposed to be metaphoric but we all know he was chopping off heads left and right.

Then something went horribly wrong, and I know what happened, but I can’t tell you exactly how. I was still standing in Nicole’s courtyard, of course, but for a few moments I couldn’t remember how I’d gotten there, when I’d arrived, or even why I was there. Then it came back to me, very slowly: The recital-with little Sydney up on stage, dancing her little heart out; me, chipping balls into my neighbor’s yard; Paula, angry, not answering her phone; Charlie, stopping by the house to tell me some more ugly shit about Nicole’s behavior. Then what? The short, quick drive from Rockingham to the Bundy condo. And now? Now I was standing in Nicole’s courtyard, in the dark, listening to the loud, rhythmic, accelerated beating of my own heart. I put my left hand to my heart and my shirt felt strangely wet. I looked down at myself. For several moments, I couldn’t get my mind around what I was seeing. The whole front of me was covered in blood, but it didn’t compute. Is this really blood? I wondered. And whose blood is it? Is it mine? Am I hurt?

No, but you should be.

By J. Harvey

  1. T-Bone

    Isn’t there any way to put this psychopathic killer behind bars?

  2. NuggetBrain

    Ugh, he makes my physically ill.

  3. Joley

    I am honestly nauseated every time I see a picture of this thing.

  4. MissNee


    He can be sent away for something else but he will never goto prison for what he did in 1994

  5. SmartyPants

    Sadly, I will always remember the scream coming from Ron Goldman’s sister in the courtroom when it was announced he was found innocent.

  6. LM

    revolting. total con man. had a black out? manipulative jerk…

  7. LM

    revolting. total con man. had a black out? manipulative jerk.

  8. Smith

    Actually I find these O.J. pics very useful – it gives me new pics to put up on the faces of the silhouttes when I go to the shooting range. I have to admit I kind of get off on filling O.J.’s face with gunfire.

  9. dinigi

    PLEASE stop feeding his insatiable ego by paying him any attention…like Madonna et al, they CRAVE it!!

  10. Bobby Ewing

    But what about his son Jason L. Simpson?

    See this for more info:


  11. Kare Bear

    Bobby Ewing, I am in shock after reading that other theory. Why was this never pursued further? It really makes spooky sense and the best part about it he cannot claim double jeopardy as a defense because the charges that could be brought against him would be almost as serious but entirely different. Ranging from accessory to homocide, accessory after the fact, etc. there are any number of offences that they can charge him with. I hope they pursue this now that this book is probably going to be published after all.

    I watched CNN for a long time last night between this story and the one about Jessie Davis (the missing girl). Anywho…I think that yes justice definitely needs to prevail however I think that Mr. Goldberg is a greedy gold digger. All the money in the world is not going to bring Ron back or for that matter Nicole either. Dammit there are still two children that are the survivors of all of this. I feel so badly for them. Their mother is dead & their father is definitely involved with her death. This whole thing is unbelievable!

  12. T-Bone

    Interesting, Bobby Ewing, but would justice be so blind as to completely dismiss other close suspects? Someone had to have pursued this lead and found it a dead end, I would think. If not, they certainly should pursue it. The case is still open, is it not?

  13. Kare Bear

    T-Bone, Murder cases especially one as high profile as this never close they may go into cold case file status but there is no statute of limitations on charging someone with murder.

  14. T-Bone

    So who’s going to call the LA Distric Attorney’s office, Kare Bear — you, me or Bobby Ewing? (just saying that made me laugh ;)

  15. Kare Bear

    Thx for the laugh T-Bone, All three of us…ASL Political Action Group LOL

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