Observations of an Obsessive Compulsive TV Aficionado

Welcome back to another addition of OCD TV! Today I would like to talk about a little British show called Katie and Peter. I myself am a half Brit, I grew up over there until my pre teen years and my mother and her whole family are English which may explain why while my humor runs on the dry side, I still find men dressing in women’s clothes for comedy absolutely hilarious. I also sometimes have trouble putting my u’s and e’s in different places but that’s something I am working diligently with a weekly therapist to cure. So I might be a bit biased on this weeks subject, but I will do my best to approach it as if I were not in fact British, but Swiss.

I first discovered Katie Price and Peter Andre about two and half years ago when I was over in England visiting family and my boyfriend. (yes my boyfriend is also British, I keep it real yo) The T.V. was on while we were getting ready to go out,I wasn’t really paying much attention to it, I just remember glancing at it and seeing two incredibly tanned people talking to one incredibly pale person in a talk show format. The shear magnitude of their tans on a British talk show caught my interest, as well as their matching outfits and heavy make up and so I started listening. What I heard was one of the funniest interviews I had seen on Television, the two tanees were obviously a couple and the segment turned into them having an argument about who they had slept with and how slutty they both were before meeting each other. That in itself may not sound like the height of comedy, but it really was the argument itself, it was real and the girl had the most wicked mouth on her and it was honestly just funny. Nothing scripted or fake, just real, in the moment and funny. In the middle of this I called my boyfriend into the room and asked him who the heck these oddly browned people were. He told me that the girl was known as Jordan, a Page 3 Glamour model (from tabloid newspaper The Sun which features topless models on the third page of the paper) who was famous for getting into fights in public with other models and just for generally being a bit wild. The guy was Peter Andre, a sort of washed up Australian pop singer who had a few hits in the early 90’s but hadn’t done anything since. The couple had met on the show I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here,! where B list celebs live in the jungle without the comforts of home, and the two were inseparable ever since.

More on Jordan and Peter after the jump.

I’ve followed these two off and on ever since because they make me laugh. They are the cheesiest couple on earth and they revel in it, matching outfits, highlights and once again those tans, so I was incredibly excited when I heard that they had a show coming on E! Screw the Beckhams with their fancy schmancy designer clothes, cars and houses, I wanted to see tacky clothes, fake boobs and hear rude British slang! Time to show the masses that not all British people sound like Mary Poppins and have perfect manners, there are more ways to call someone a rude name in Britain than here. So I was a little disappointed when I watched the first episode and realized that it was all old footage from an original Newlyweds style British show that aired when the couple had just got engaged. To give you an idea of how long ago that was, they have since had a lavish Barbie Princess style wedding, have had one baby, one miscarriage and are currently pregnant with another and have also released two books and two albums since being together. None of that has yet to happen on the show. But I watched it anyway because as soon as I saw Jordan’s kitchen with all hot pink appliances I knew that I had barely scratched the surface. Katie Price really does think she is Barbie and now with her Ken by her side, she is on the way to completing her life with a Barbie Dream House and full Barbie wardrobe. (I’m not kidding, she actually modeled the wedding after the Cinderella Barbie and Prince Charming, they had outfits made to match the dolls and the carriage and pink horses too.) Her house is out in the countryside and is a lovely big old British farmhouse, not quite what you would imagine for a girl with FF implants, but inside it’s like stepping into Tony Soprano’s home. The whole inside is really strange, big open rooms with thick white carpet and sparsely placed tacky furniture, and of course lots of pink.

Something that I did find annoying and distracting was the weird and out of place American voice over that interjects during the show to say things like “Katie and Peter head off to a photo shoot, Peter hopes that Katie’s alter ego Jordan doesn’t make an appearance”. It’s just so jarringly different from the rest of the show and really doesn’t say anything useful, much like the translations that run at the bottom of the screen at times. Do American’s really not know what Knickers are?

As for the couple themselves, they don’t disappoint. Katie/Jordan usually looks like a porn star and likes to show the camera how she cuts all her skirts so that they are three inches long, and Peter follows her around wearing white tracksuits and sulking when she doesn’t pay attention to him. The guy is definitely pussy whipped, she always gets her way and there’s nothing he can ever say because she has a retort for everything and they are usually funny ones. And that’s what draws me to the show, their sense of humor and also a true love for each other and family always manages to make it’s way through all the silly fluff. Katie has a son from a previous relationship who is blind and looks a bit like Emmanuel Lewis (even though he is only two), and her dedication to him is what has endeared her to a lot of women who would otherwise write her off as a self obsessed fame whore. A lot of people won’t agree with the life style of Katie Price and Peter Andre, but at the end of the day of nude posing and rude words, they are fun to watch and have a laugh at or with, sometimes it’s both. My hope is that this show gets enough viewers so that they will come to the US and film their own show here. Because while Jordan may stick out like a sore thumb in Britain with her giant boobs and fake tan, here she could actually blend in quite easily. The only thing that would separate her is her mouth and in this country which has become so boringly P.C., she could cause a lot of trouble that would be really fun to watch.