Nicole’s Runnin’ Things

August 17th, 2007 // 10 Comments

Nicole Richie has forbid her sperm donor Joel Madden from posing for pics with any other women to prevent any squawking from the tabs. She’s got his ass on lockdown. Who can blame her. If I was about to shove a human through a small opening for him, I’d make sure he followed my every command.

Wednesday night, Madden went to celebrate the first anniversary of the Village Pourhouse on Third Avenue, and all was well until a party promoter wanted to take a picture of him with a cute young woman. Our spy reports, “He said he couldn’t, as Nicole gave him strict orders not to take pictures with other celebrities or girls for rumor purposes.”

Would a grandma be ok? Nicole’s trying to control the world. She’s going to realize she can’t when her kid grows up to be as annoying and snotty as her. And rumor control be damned – the second Joel sees a stretch mark he’s going to be onto the nubile nineteen year old in the third row. When she pogoes it makes her boobies look tremendous! What baby?

Nicole and Joel Continue Home Hunting Along With Nicole’s Bump After the Jump

By J. Harvey

  1. hmweis1

    Oh yeah, that’s real rock and roll….being all matchy matchy with your knocked up bimbet.

  2. emma

    It isnt going to last long if she acts like the bitch she really is.

  3. Leonine7

    J. harvey you have the most wicked-wittiest humor ever…bless you for it and enjoy it daily!

  4. gail

    Is there anyone lamer looking than this guy? Not bad looking. Not gay looking. Just…lame. Dorky.

    Bad Charlotte! Bad!!

  5. Eyes of Green

    She looks so good now ~ except for the Mr. Magoo glasses she keeps wearing.

  6. T-Bone

    I hate her she is just a ugly Nig, wanting to be a pretty white girl. Joel should be hung

  7. lookwhaticando

    I confess that last T-Bone comment was really me. I just hate black girlz who pass for white. I’m jealous ok. I admit it. I’m mentally sick and hate everyone. Even myself.

  8. Eyes of Green, i absolutely agree! This is the best she has ever looked.

    Fingers crossed she is a helluva lot better mom than i imagine she will be….sigh.

  9. joan durtz

    hey t-bone,

    keep your cracker comments to yourself white girl.

  10. joan durtz

    hey t-bone,

    keep your cracker ass comments to yourself white girl. that is why we white people get a bad wrap because bitches like you have to bring up race. By reading you comment, I doubt anyone wants to pass for white.

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