Miss USA Under Tight Surveillance

The New York Post reports that Tara Conner’s on probation.

MISS USA Tara Conner is out of rehab, but Donald Trump and the Miss Universe Organization are keeping a tight leash on her.

“She is not allowed to go to clubs anymore,” dished the spy, “and she has a lot of new rules for going out.” A spokesperson for Miss USA said, “Plans to move to a bigger apartment with a chaperone have been in the works for months, and Tara is free to go wherever she wants.”

Tara has had to change apartments and now has the aforementioned “chaperone”.

They have also tagged her ear with a homing device like an animal in the wild would receive, and have fitted her for a chastity belt. Luckily, both of these morbid accessories seem to go with a variety of her outfits. Screw that, gimme drugs.