Michael Lohan’s Ex Erin Muller Accuses Him Of Abuse

In an unsurprising turn of events, Michael Lohan is being accused by his ex-girlfriend, Erin Muller, of repeated domestic abuse, including an incident in which he kicked her in the vagina. God, it hurt to even type that.

TMZ reports that Muller has filed court documents in response to Lohan’s claim of harassment, which depict Lindsay Lohan’s father as an remorseless abuser. The documents cite attacks from December 2007 up until June of 2008 and include slapping and spitting in face, punching and kicking. These pictures taken of the supposedly happy couple at the Mercedes-Benz Polo Challenge in Bridgehampton, New York in July 2009 must have been taken on one of the relationship’s better days.

Additionally, Erin says he threatened to kill her for crying when punched her repeatedly and saying, “Other people will see you–if they see you, I will kill you!” It’s kind of his signature move–something for the ladies to remember him by.

How is this man single? He’s such a catch.