Mario Lopez Loses His Underwear

Mario Lopez is one jealous bitch! The extremely chiseled/perky buttocked star of Saved by the Bell and Dancing with the Stars fame is engaged in a feud with one of his Broadway co-stars. It’s a total All About Eve sitch, except replace Bette Davis and the younger heifer with Mario and some total rent boy looking kid.

Here’s what happened. Mario is starring on Broadway in A Chorus Line. And he’s developed a jealous fixation with one Nick Adams, a performer in the show. Adams apparently has a bod to rival AC Slater’s and Lopez, in true jealous queen fashion, isn’t having it. He eschewed the normal long-sleeved sweater his character wears for a short-sleeved shirt to show off the pipes. AND he insisted that Adams were a hoodie to cover HIS arms whenever he was dancing next to him! Rrraaaoowww! Mmmmmeeoooww hiisssss! Damn, get kitty a bowl of milk and tell him to shut the f*ck up!

Oh, there’s more. When Adams does show off the bod and wear a tank top in the opening dance number, he’s banished to the back of the stage and the audience can barely see him.

Mo-pez (and yes, that was an intentional typo) didn’t get the last cackle, though. It seems as thought gay underwear company 2(x)ist was originally going to sign Mario to a contract to advertise their drawers. But then someone saw Adams in action. Later, Slater.

“Mario was originally No. 1 on our radar as we planned the campaign,”
said an insider. “We were ready to call him with an offer, but then we
saw Nick. He’s younger, sexy, more interesting. On top of that, his
body was crazy. We set up a meeting, and when he walked in, that was
it. We never even looked at anyone else after that,” says an “insider”. That’s a real life Zack Attack. That’s harsher than when Jesse Spano got strung out on caffeine pills.

Nick Adams had em’ all panting over at gay underwear headquarters.

“Nick’s very masculine, sexy, modern. It’s totally all about his body.
Mario is a good-looking guy, but Nick had it. He’s up and coming, the
new face of sexy. He’s original. He’s hot,” says Jason Scarlatti, 2(x)ist’s creative director.

The ad campaign has already been shot and will appear in Out magazine’s August issue. Lopez’s camp (which is probably just Dustin Diamond with a pre-paid cell phone) had no comment.

Click any of the photos to view the gallery of 18 photos of Mario Lopez in A Chorus Line.


Mario Lopez is one jealous bitch! The extremely chiseled/perky
buttocked star of Saved by the Bell and Dancing with the Stars fame is
engaged in a feud with one of his Broadway co-stars. It’s a total All
About Eve
sitch, except replace Bette Davis and the younger heifer with
Mario and some total rent boy looking kid.

Here’s what happened. Mario is starring on Broadway in A Chorus Line.
And he’s developed a jealous fixation with one Nick Adams, a performer
in the show. Adams apparently has a bod to rival AC Slater’s and Lopez,
in true jealous queen fashion, isn’t having it. He eschewed the normal
long-sleeved sweater his character wears for a short-sleeved shirt to
show off the pipes. AND he insisted that Adams were a hoodie to cover
HIS arms whenever he was dancing next to him! Rrraaaoowww! Mmmmmeeoooww
hiisssss! Damn, get kitty a bowl of milk and tell him to shut the f*ck
up!

Oh, there’s more. When Adams does show off the bod and wear a tank top
in the opening dance number, he’s banished to the back of the stage and
the audience can barely see him.

Mo-pez (and yes, that was an intentional typo) didn’t get the last
cackle, though. It seems as thought gay underwear company 2(x)ist was
originally going to sign Mario to a contract to advertise their
drawers. But then someone saw Adams in action. Later, Slater.

“Mario was originally No. 1 on our radar as we planned the campaign,”
said an insider. “We were ready to call him with an offer, but then we
saw Nick. He’s younger, sexy, more interesting. On top of that, his
body was crazy. We set up a meeting, and when he walked in, that was
it. We never even looked at anyone else after that,” says an “insider”.
That’s a real life Zack Attack. That’s harsher than when Jesse Spano
got strung out on caffeine pills.

Nick Adams had em’ all panting over at gay underwear headquarters.

“Nick’s very masculine, sexy, modern. It’s totally all about his body.
Mario is a good-looking guy, but Nick had it. He’s up and coming, the
new face of sexy. He’s original. He’s hot,” says Jason Scarlatti, 2(x)ist’s creative director.

The ad campaign has already been shot and will appear in Out magazine’s
August issue. Lopez’s camp (which is probably just Dustin Diamond with
a pre-paid cell phone) had no comment.