Mariah Carey Gearing Up To Visit All Of Us

July 24th, 2008 // 2 Comments

Is that a unicorn I hear whinnying? Mariah Carey is readying her spandex dresses, butterfly attendants, and cotton candy dreamship to tour the world. Prepare to have your eyes Photo-shopped. You know she’s developing the technology.

She told MTV’s John Norris that the E=MC2 world tour (sciency!) is set to debut in November.

“Please don’t hold me accountable if it turns out to be December 5 or December 7 or January 18!,” she says. Ok, Random.

“I’m thinking elaborate,” she said. “I like elaborate. We only do
substantial. That’s what my jeweler says. I haven’t gotten the looks in
mind just yet, but we’re going to figure it out soon enough,” she says about the tour’s look.

Who is she kidding? She’s going to have some sort of dress spray-painted on her thickness, and she’s going to come down from the ceiling in a shower of cotton candy. And not dance. Bitch can’t dance. Just don’t, Mimi. I’ve seen you gallop around on your high heels. We don’t want you to break anything. Like our hearts. *swoon*

Click any photo to view all 23 photos of Mariah Carey in the gallery!


Is that a unicorn I hear whinnying? Mariah Carey is
readying her spandex dresses, butterfly attendants, and cotton candy
dreamship
to tour the world. Prepare to have your eyes Photo-shopped.
You know she’s developing the technology.She told MTV’s John Norris that the E=MC2 world tour (sciency!) is set to debut in November.”Please don’t hold me accountable if it turns out to be December 5 or December 7 or January 18!,” she says. Ok, Random. “I’m thinking elaborate,” she said. “I like elaborate. We only do
substantial. That’s what my jeweler says. I haven’t gotten the looks in
mind just yet, but we’re going to figure it out soon enough,” she says about the tour’s look.Who is she kidding? She’s going to have some sort of dress spray-painted on her thickness,
and she’s going to come down from the ceiling in a shower of cotton
candy. And not dance. Bitch can’t dance. Just don’t, Mimi. I’ve seen
you gallop around on your high heels. We don’t want you to break
anything. Like our hearts. *swoon*Check out all 23 photos of Mariah Carey in the gallery!

By J. Harvey
asl

  1. green cardigan

    She’s thinking elaborate. Well, who’d have thought ?? That’s a bolt out of the blue…NOT.

    I think Mimi should shock the world and do a minimalist show. Just her on a broken stool doing solo acoustic versions of such classics as ‘Touch My Body’.
    And the show should be about 5 minutes long.
    Behind a curtain.
    With the volume turned down.
    just the distant sound of sea horses being slaughtered.

  2. angelchrome

    “just the distant sound of sea horses being slaughtered.”

    Glorious. I never liked her but I kinda think she’s cute now in a fluffy useless way.

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