‘Mad Men’ Recap: ‘Dark Shadows’, Sexy Alexis Bledel Shows Some Skin

Season Five's Surprises
Mad Men Best Season Reveals A Boatload Of Crazy
Well, it was going to happen sometime. All of the amazing episodes we’ve been experiencing on this season of AMC’s Mad Men had to lead to a dull moment. Unfortunately, this involved January Jones who hasn’t been featured very much this season. 

So fat Betty is less fat now and is attending Weight Watchers meetings. But let’s talk about it, Betty isn’t really fat. She is just not perfectly model-esque anymore and neither is her life. Remember a few seasons back when things were so sickeningly sweet on Draper avenue that you couldn’t help, but somewhat sympathize with Don’s wandering eye?

Don’t get me wrong, Don has been a cheating dirtbag since episode one, but Betty has always had her priorities in all the wrong places. On the outside their lives seemed perfect, but both of them were miserable. Now Don has Megan, who isn’t afraid to be herself and Betty has a massive haunted house that could double as the Harmon family residence on American Horror Story

So because Betty is very slowly learning to find happiness in the right areas of her life, she still falls into the ex-spouse warfare when she sees Don and Megan’s apartment. She also sees Megan’s skinny little zou bisou body. Time to binge on that whipped cream Betty! She then tells little Sally that Don had another wife that he never told the kids about named Anna. Sally is confused, but because she is Betty’s messed up daughter, she confronts Megan. 

Megan tells Don and convinces him not to call Betty. And Don handles things well with Sally, telling her the truth about Anna without revealing his old life as Dick Whitman. This truth telling seems to gain Sally’s trust and the tides may turn for this little girl in favor of her father. Poor Betty can’t eat, so naturally she is going to indulge in poisoning her ex. 

Bert Cooper approaches Roger about wooing a Jewish wine company. And because Roger is both terrible with ad ideas and super racist, he enlists the Jewish Michael Ginsberg to do his bidding. Then he calls up his soon to be ex-wife Jane to use her Jewish charm. Classy bro. Yet again, Roger has to pay another employee for his loyalty. 

Then he sees Jane getting hit on by the client’s son and decides to bone her in her new apartment. Jane is sad because she is trying to distance herself from Roger and all the bad memories. Roger is like a little puppy dog that has yet to be neutered. He just humps, chews, and dumps, then feels sad about disobeying afterward. 

Don has a late night at the office and spies on some of Ginsberg’s work. He comes up with a cute little ad involving the devil for a snowballs campaign, but it doesn’t quite compare to Michael’s idea about kids throwing snowballs at the cops. Even though everyone agrees that Michael’s idea is better, Don uses his ad during the pitch to the clients and they choose the devil. Ginsberg has balls enough to face Don, but is belittled right away. 

Peggy confronts Roger about hiring Ginsberg for the wine company over her. It’s a giant episode of jealousy and depression and back stabbing. Then there is Pete, who fantasizes about Beth (Alexis Bledel) and who wouldn’t? In his daydreams, she enters his office wearing nothing but panties and a black fur coat, nearly showing the entirety of her tah-tahs. Pete is a pervert, but no one was complaining about that little fantasy. 

On Thanksgiving, Betty keeps dieting and telling herself she has it all, but we know that material life will never satisfy her. Betty needs to find her ass from her elbow before she ever embarks on an existential journey. Her daughter Sally will need all the drug rehab and therapy she can find in her adulthood, but at least she has some sense of herself. 

Megan prepares the perfect meal and Don is sweating from the oven heat. Devil metaphor much? He wants to open the sliding glass porch doors, but Megan tells him there is toxic air. This was a cheap symbolism, but it wrapped the episode up for us in a nice little bow. Yes, these Mad Men’s lives can be toxic and evil. Luckily, there is enough triumph in their self discovery to keep us hanging on.