Kim Kardashian’s Gigantic Ass Not Taken Into Account By ‘Fitness’ Magazine

March 25th, 2008 // 9 Comments

magazine is putting Kim Kardashian on their cover. Someone’s trying to boost circulation. Kim looks good but then you get around to the back and small children are trapped in her mammoth caboose. Small children and their bikes.

America likes a big ass, though. I know I do. I’m just saying that her ass is not the muscular, well-toned ass Fitness wants and needs. Her ass is a badonka donk ass that stems from her munching on “a cheeseburger, a taco, a bite of a hot dog, a bit of KFC and two doughnuts” for lunch. And she’s trying to give up her favorite treat of deep-fried Oreos. Ugh. Who makes that? That’s the kind of thing you need to buy your own fry daddy for, right?

Fitness is also known for using Photoshop to shave inches off the bodies of their cover models. Try “feet”. Try 3 1/2 lbs. of bologna and a canned ham from this ass!

Here the Kardashians at Easter Sunday service at Calvary Church in in West Hollywood. God forgives you for getting your forehead peed on, Kimmy.


By J. Harvey

  1. btchyspice

    who knew miss kim was so religious? her purple, green, gold, and black dress is tied in so well with the church calendar.

    canonize her, already.

    rme. (coincidence at best.)

  2. Cat

    She is not even fit! On top of that not even tone! Which sends the wrong message about fitness for those who are motiavied to stay fit. Ahh no way she should be on there at all. Not long ago on a beach with her boyfriend and can see how her body is so loose and jiggly, was nasty!

  3. tolstoyesvsky

    I’m pretty sure she had ass implants, and not a smorgasboard of junk food to accomplish that shelf. I could rest my drink on her back rack. That’s convenient.

  4. surfergrl98

    I read somewhere that Kim was looking to eat healthier for the New Year. I mean in one of the new season of her show, her mom even goes as far as buying chickens to eat healthier! Maybe Fitness wanted someone that is more real and has a curvy shaply body – like a normal woman :) I think Kim looks great!

  5. joan durtz

    Her ass is fake! Period. And shaped weird. Frankly, I think Fitness is trying to reach a younger demographic so they are putting this talentless cow on the cover.

  6. Tay tay

    stop hating cuz she look better then all yall

  7. princess

    man im a girl and im straight an just lookin at her makes me wont to hop on dat, just kidding

  8. sami

    video gigantic ass

  9. Tyrone L. Cypress

    To the Editors,

    For your consideration:

    I have written an article for which I would like your consideration for publication and distribution. My article is entitled “NOT BAD FOR AN OLD MAN”. The article spans four (4) type written pages and briefly chronicles my successful plight in starting a fitness program over the age of sixty. I talk about how I went from 216 lbs to 173 lbs and regained my 32″ waistline in a little more than 3 months. I discovered some weight-room techniques and diet tips that I share with my over sixty brethren and challenge them to follow my lead (with the full understanding that I know how hard becoming fit can be). I break down the story in seven (7) topical headings and conclude the article with the following closing:

    “I wonder if there is a future in modeling skimpy swimwear for an old guy. SIXTY IS THE NEW SEXY”.

    This article has not been previously published. In 2006 I wrote and published an unrelated book “SAY IT LOUD…I Sell and I’m Proud”, iUniverse, pub. Thanks, Tyrone.

    Tyrone L. Cypress
    3311 Hibiscus Court
    Ellicott City, MD 21043

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