Jessica Biel Treated Like Kleenex: Soft, Strong and Disposable

February 6th, 2007 // 3 Comments


Yes, I stole that from the movie Clue. But it’s fitting. Because Scarjo has made a comeback! Into Justin Timberlake’s bedroom full of vests and ‘kerchiefs and hand cremes! He left Jessica Biel’s ass on the ski board slope in Park City, and let Scarlett Johansson get all up in his area during the Superbowl festivities .

Justin Timberlake had more fun in Miami than the Chicago Bears on Super Bowl weekend, hitting it off with Scarlett Johansson at a glamorous postgame party. Johansson met Timberlake at the Hennessey Super Bowl afterparty at Mokai, where, spies say, “they were talking, dancing, holding hands all night – it was very cozy.

“Then, as they left through the back, Justin was leaning against the wall and Scarlett came up, leaned into him and did a sexy, little dance, grinding into his body.”

And you know she used those Issac Mizrahi-molested boobies to full effect. Johansson, 1, Biel, 1, Justin Timberlake, 50,000 and ten credits towards a free game. It’s on now! This could only get better if Biel and her lesbian Amazon workout buddies tracked Scarjo down to give her a beating and Diaz interrupted the whole thing by trying to run them all down in her SUV. All I know is, someone’s eventually going to drown in that pool at Melrose Place.

By J. Harvey

  1. cracktastic

    j harvey, I LOVE your commentary…you are one of the funniest bitches blogging today, but…

    someone DID drown in the pool at melrose place, don’t you remember?

    it was the girl who played the prissy one on Sex and the City.

  2. Kitty K@

    … You had me at the clue refrence! lmao

  3. jh

    Jessica Biel did not go to Sundance to see Justin Timberlake. She went to attend a dinner and cocktail party for a movie she is slated to be starring in tentativley called Open Road, directed by Mike Meredith.
    Haven’t people noticed that all these reports from the tabloids conflict. One says Timberlake contacted Biel, others Biel contacted Timberlake.
    Some say she was on the skl lift with JT while others say she was taken by helicopter. None mention she was filming hole in the paper sky during sundance and she was still at Sundance attending chefdance after Timberlake had long gone.

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