Jeremy Piven Embracing His Destiny

August 30th, 2007 // 6 Comments

Look at this one. Could he be any douchier? Isn’t he a little old for the California hipster deal? Why does this new role seem incredibly fitting for him? Jeremy Piven is going to play a used car salesman in his next flick. He’s going to co-star with Will Ferrell. Another irritating one. Why does this concept remind me of the time I was trying to put a belt on and I drove the spike that goes through the hole UNDER MY FINGERNAIL. I would rather do that to myself again and again then watch these two pricks interact. I’d rather watch real life footage of Piven mocking a hostess for working in a restaurant or screaming at his aged mother in public. That’s interesting to me. Or him masturbating to a glossy 8×10 of his former best friend John Cusack. You know he used to do that back in the day.

“The Goods: The Don Ready Story” is the first comedy Paramount Vantage has green-lighted under its deal with Will Ferrell and Adam McKay’s Gary Sanchez Prods.

Piven will play a character who’s hired to save a struggling car dealership during a Fourth of July weekend sale.

Ugh, no thanks. But I’m sure it will be a big hit with the fratboy set. Or maybe it will be a flop! And as embarrassing for that tool Piven as the time I spelled “Venetian” as “Venician”. Yes, that was yesterday.


By J. Harvey

  1. They already did this film…it was a documentary called “Slasher”…well, close enough.

    ALSO, I do love The Piv, but I have always thought he was gay…not that there’s anything wrong with that. Some of my best friends are gay! My cousin is gay! At least come out of the closet already…or is that what he’s doing with that ensemble? ha ha

  2. green cardigan

    He’s prone to hissy fits isn’t he? Gay. I speak from experience. My brother (who (whom?) I love to bits) is gay and throws little hissy fits every now and again. Drama you know.

  3. ChicagoMark

    Damn the bald guy to Jeremy’s right is pretty hot.

  4. Interloper

    I used to see the “cute” in the Piv but lately he’s morphed into “DIVA MAN”(C) Plus he insists on wearing weird ensembles that instead of making him appear young and hip make him look like a pudgy, middle-aged banker on vacation.

  5. ZeldaF

    I think I’d want to keep small children and furry woodland animals away from this guy…….

  6. ZeldaF

    AND Leprechauns as well…….

Leave A Comment