Jayden James Federline Is Unharmed

Well, it looks like Britney might be a mess but she’s not the type to shake the baby. Thank christ for small favors. Reports say that despite having been drunk or high or whatever she was trippin’ on and locking herself away with the baby during yesterday morning’s meltdown, JJ was unharmed. A previously reported “bruise” was just a normal rash type thing that little kids get. The reason why JJ was taken to the hospital is because it’s standard procedure on the part of the authorities in a “traumatic” incident in the home like the one that happened. Though, don’t even think that JJ didn’t try to spell out “Get Me The F*ck Away From This Crazy” or “Adopt Me” in drool or with Cheerios or something for the hospital staff to see.