Hooowee, girl. Just no.
Let’s talk, Janet Jackson. First of all, love you. ‘Dream Street‘ was my very first cassette; I bought it with my allowance when I was 7. You owe me eight bucks. Just kidding! See, I can joke with you ’cause we got it like that.
Anyway, love the new haircut. You should literally keep that haircut forever, it looks that good on you.
But I have to tell you, girl, you gotta keep those victorias more of a secret. You’re letting it all hang out at this screening of Why Did I Get Married, Too? in London yesterday. No one is denying you look great these days, but this is the age of media and tacky never dies.
I’m glad we had this chat, Janet (Miss Jackson ’cause I’m nasty).