James Van Der Beek And His Accessories Go To The Doctor’s

March 19th, 2008 // 12 Comments

James Van Der Beek is wearing what looks like the entire men’s accessories rack from American Eagle at once. He’s got the pendant, the bead bracelet, the sunglasses, and the cheap ring. Wait, that’s a wedding band.

All he’s missing is the leather thong bracelet and that damn bird icon on his tit. American Eagle is funny because it was originally trying to be the next Abercrombie & Fitch. The AE marketing team then realized that Abercrombie & Fitch is the gayest store to ever feature soft-core porn photos of teenage boys. So they quickly backpedaled as if to say, “No. No. We’re all man! We like vagine!”

Dawson is leaving a medical center in Los Angeles. Can one of you eagle-eyed readers who work in the medical profession fill me in on what he’s carting around? Is that protein? Some sort of ointment? Diaper wipes?

I wonder if he ever gets on the horn, and tries to convince Katie Holmes to make a break for it. Sometimes I really miss the Creek. I don’t miss Andie, though. That bitch was crazy and talked to dead people.

Photos: WENN

By J. Harvey

  1. Zekers

    They’re “Condoms in a Drum” the extra-ginormous size…

    He’s cute, minus the Mr. T starter-set.

  2. green cardigan

    It’s willy growth hormone. In powder form. 85% guaranteed to work, or your money back!

  3. Zekers

    How does that work Green? Does one dip or sprinkle?

  4. me!

    heh…he’s around the corner from my cosmetic surgeon’s office.

  5. MikeinSanJo

    Is that his cock ring on his necklace?

    Poor Dawson.

  6. Helen Skor

    It looks like barium contrast that you have to take for a CT scan. Maybe he’s having issues with his pooper.

  7. citmyway

    OOh, I so agree on the Andie remark!! I always thought that bitch was fruit loops!!! She never deserved Pacey. OOOH PACEY!! How I loved him!

  8. person

    I COULDNT stand Andie!!!!! I especially hated her when she cheated on her SATs! What a wench!

    I wish there were still Dawson reruns on TBS. Those were the days.

  9. Daniee

    Looks like a fibre supplement. He is still such a cutie!!

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