Irritating Couple Doesn’t Die In Plane Crash

What a stirring, inspirational story. Ashlee Simpson was able to get her ladydude Pete Wentz through his fear of flying so he could DJ in the Hamptons. It’s almost like when Annie Sullivan spelled “water” in Helen Keller’s hand! He even saw a rainbow!

Although the Fall Out Boy was terrified to fly, the couple took a seaplane to the Hamptons last Friday night so he could DJ at Hamptons club Dune. Wentz confessed to club promoters Alan Philips and Josh Shames he’s afraid of flying, but said of his new love: “She keeps me calm so I am able to handle it. We saw a rainbow, and I photographed it on my new iPhone.”

Way to shill for Steve Jobs, whore. We should all have these people’s problems. They probably saw a rainbow reflected in the gigantic pile of cocaine they had on their tray.