Henry Cavill Is Engaged

Hear ye, hear ye.  Devastating news for singletons everywhere: Henry Cavill is officially off the market.

I know, I know.  We all thought we had a chance with the Man Of Steel hunk.  Point your fingers at one Ellen Whitaker, who stole the heart of our Tudor duke and make him swear to love her and only her.  The rest of us weep by the side of the road, uncertain if our own handsome, perfectly chiseled Englishman will ever come.

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Whitaker is a British equestrian hoping to make it on her country’s showjumping team for the 2012 Olympics.  She’s blond and likes horses, and must do something really spectacular to have landed someone as good-looking at Cavill.  Whitaker told the Belfast Telegraph that Cavill had taken her completely by surprise with the engagement.  “I thought we were there to celebrate his birthday. It was such a surprise and I am so happy,” she said.  Prior to popping the question, Cavill asked Whitaker’s father for her hand.

Damn it.  All the good ones are officially taken.