Happy Gays are Here Again

June 21st, 2007 // 4 Comments

June is Homosexual History Month.

Somewhere, out there on the inter-tubes, you’ll find a well-intentioned, queerical obsessed do-gooder who will inform you how gay history changed one June morning.

But let’s keep it simple, sugar – remedial
, so to speak:


nation at war.


No Starbucks.
No Whole Foods. No hope.


Diagnosed dead.


Drunk. Drunker.



Drag Queen

let go my wig!”




Ran….and so
did the cops when
riotous melee ensued

We gays have come a long way from those days, although we still wax our pecs. Still, there’s much to celebrate — whether its gay proms
or gay moms or Uncle Thoms who’ll adopt a Guatemalan brother and sister and
name them Will and Grace.

And for you uppity Tom (Ford) fronting bitches, never forget that modern gay history
began in a badly-lit barroom brawl steeped in the stench of piss, regret and poppers.

And while dip-shittery, douche-baggery and the D-Listed, D-cupped décolletage of drugged-up debutantes is today’s latest gay rage – we must still honor our past.

good news is that since we
am what we is
, we can keep it fresh….and kind of zany!

why, in this homo-rific holiday season, I’d like to share the charming, clever,
and completely off-kilter antics of JudyCast.
I puddle in my slacks every time I tune in!

Created by Bill Phair (today
is his birthday, by the way) these podcasts are a surreal one man show, offering
scads of vocal-stylings, well-crafted editing, brilliant zingers and a certain…après

Is that the right expression? Oh, I dunno…I’m struggling to find the right words…and my pills.

Anyway, it’s like an old-school radio show – but radio, totally two-point-Oh!!!!!

Phair channels Judy Garland, Bernadette Peters, Pia Zadora, Ike Turner, Carol Channing and Gollum….um yeah, Gollum….I’m not kidding. And the results are simply marvelous (say it with a slur for added effect).

You may have to brush up on your old-school faggotry before downloading these podcasts – think Lerner And Lowe and eight-dollar blow.

And be proud that you’re free to flip your collars and flop your flips coz’ Dorothy o.d.’ed and a ticked-off tranny took on some tear gas.

Do it for yourself.

Do it for Judy.

Now get your earbuds out of TMZ’s ass, fagling.

It’s time for a real show.

- – - – -

A few of the most recent episodes:

June’s Episode: Bernadette Peter’s cover of She Bop closes the show

Episode 21: Oscar de la Raspberry. Favorite line, “Welcome to Non-Sequiturs Anonymous.”

Episode 20: Judy Garland’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” — Judy and Golum cover Gnarls

- – - – -

*Before y’all get feisty about this rainbow shit, the original flag had eight colors. Look it up.


  1. JudyCast is, quite simply, one of the main reasons why I have broadband internet.

  2. Mizarkey

    I so agree. The brilliance of Bill in capturing Judy’s razor-sharp wit and defiance is what makes the show so special. The show is a real treat and a blast.

  3. Loob

    “I puddle in my slacks”

    Ohmigod, I can’t stop laughing at that! I have to adopt the phrase.

    Dang, I wish I had broadband internet. :(

  4. valski

    Who else but the gays would include light blue in their rainbow?

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