Gwen Stefani Is Out Of The Hospital With Her Horribly Named Baby

August 25th, 2008 // 6 Comments

Gavin Rossdale drove Gwen Stefani home from the hospital yesterday. They named their friggin’ baby Zuma. What is wrong with them? All I can think is that her pregnancy was so torturous that it drove her ’round the bend. Know what Zuma is? A fairly entertaining video game where you shoot balls at a Mayan temple. There is no way you should be naming your child Zuma.

And it’s not like Gavin had a say. Bitch knows who’s paying the bills. “Glycerine” was a long time ago.

Gavin’s pops is all excited.

Everyone is just so very happy,” Douglas Rossdale says. “It’s fantastic news, and I’m just so happy.”

Are you happy about your grandchild’s name? Kingston is hot, but Zuma? It sounds like the name of the archvillian in a blaxploitation flick. The kind of ho that Pam Grier used to slap across the mouth.


Gavin Rossdale drove Gwen Stefani home from the hospital yesterday. They named their friggin’ baby Zuma. What is wrong with them? All I can think is that her pregnancy was so torturous
that it drove her ’round the bend. Know what Zuma is? A fairly
entertaining video game where you shoot balls at a Mayan temple. There
is no way you should be naming your child Zuma.And it’s not like Gavin had a say. Bitch knows who’s paying the bills. “Glycerine” was a long time ago.Gavin’s pops is all excited.Everyone is just so very happy,” Douglas Rossdale says. “It’s fantastic news, and I’m just so happy.”Are
you happy about your grandchild’s name? Kingston is hot, but Zuma? It
sounds like the name of the archvillian in a blaxploitation flick. The
kind of ho that Pam Grier used to slap across the mouth.

By J. Harvey
  1. OC Trophy Wife

    Isn’t Zuma the name of one of the former Project Runway contestants. Oh wait… that’s Zulema. Close enough. Too late – I’ve now made that association in my head. So now when I see Gwen’s new baby I’ll only be able to picture an angry black woman with huge glasses. “I don’t care if you cry and cut, but you need to cry and cut.”

  2. wickedorchid

    It made me think of that sleeping pill “Lunestra”. Maybe Gwen wanted a reason to get a Luna Moth tatoo???? Didn’t anyone mention that to them? Or are their pals other morons like Pilot Inspektor’s and fifi trixabelle’s parents?

    Crikey!

  3. Sue

    And it’s not like Gavin had a say, ummmm it was Gavin who actually named the baby Zuma NOT GWEN.

  4. SKANK STEFANI

    She spent too much time at the beach.

    If she’d gone to beaches further south, the kid would be named Santa Monica.

  5. sue

    Don’t some of you people understand english, Gwen DID NOT name the baby Gavin did.

  6. Looloo

    From local comics in the country where I come from, Zuma is a big muscled, demi-god with snakes for hair.

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