Given The Evidence, What’s The Appeal?

July 29th, 2005 // 22 Comments

Who’s scrunched to the left.

Wilmer Valderrama. Along with some major cellphone support.

(Image courtesy of

By Miu von Furstenberg

  1. Icequeen

    Grower not a shower?

  2. Anonymous

    Little Zahara Jolie has a bigger dick, people.

  3. Mystery

    Please, that’s a cell phone!

  4. Brian

    ummmm…..what exactly are we supposed to see?

  5. Brian

    ohhhhh….now i get it…..nothing to see there(literally),moving on…..

  6. girlganja

    The eyes..the smile… the chest… the dark hair… Yummy! (I’m hoping the picture taken from the front is deceiving. I will hold on to the dream that we would see a more distinguished bulge from the side.)

  7. Oh no she didnt!

    Oh the wittle babie, who da wittle babie.That would be Wilmer Valderrama thats who the baby is. The one with baby dick that is.

  8. bitty boop

    THIS is what Lindsay Lohan and Ashlee Simpson were fighting over? Please! Herbie has a bigger dick! ASHLEE has a bigger dick!

  9. *Micha*

    No wonder Lindsay found him so hard to get over. His batch must look like a brown crack pipe and 2 brown rocks.

  10. Sandie

    He is hot!!!!!!
    Que papi!

  11. Denise

    GROSS OUT!!!! He’s highly overrated. Anyone that would kiss Lindsay’s nasty teeth is nauseating! That sure is a small cell phone.

  12. onelive

    Remember that it gets bigger when Wilmer gets excted. Don’t judge him.

  13. A Boy and His Dog

    He looks like a bottom to me.

  14. meme

    i hung out with wilmer on several occasions after introducing myself to him at Avalon earlier in the year. after a couple run-ins at the same clubs in LA, and the same night we were both at club concorde about a month and a half ago, a friend and i were invited to go back to his house (which is located in Ventura- if any of you live near or around there, you know where that is- not the poshest of places, but he had a pretty large house). We partied until like 6 am in the morning with all his friends. There were no drugs of any kind there, just alcohol and he hardly drank any of it. He hangs around with mainly all big African American guys (one of which I know is his personal bodyguard) and some other Venezualan friend of his. Anyways, my friend ended up going upstairs to his bedroom where he showed off his room and his ‘closet’ which, from what i heard, was HUGGGGGGE packed with all his clothes from award ceremony, as to which, he showed off with alot of pride. Anyways, Wilmer is an extremely nice person, to me that is, but kind of cheesy. My friend said he looked into her eyes at one point and said, “I think I see my soul in your eyes.” I haven’t been able to stop laughing since.
    Oh, and one other thing- Wilmer claims to know the inside scoop on all the celebrity gossip, including Brad and Angelina, Lindsay gossip and everyone else in Hollywood. He says that the tabloids are a bunch of shit, but I didn’t want to look desperate so I didn’t probe into that. He does have a few Mag’s laying around his house though- I saw Touch, People, and some others. LOL!

  15. THe TruTH

    I saw an ant that had a bigger than him…..

  16. sdf


  17. Retarted as a tard

    Lets play a fill in the blank game.

    I saw a (fill in blank)_______ that had a bigger dick than Wilmer Valderrama. Wilmer Valderrama has a dick as small as a (fill in the blank)__________. Wilmer Valderrama is not human because he does not have any sexual organs. Doctors have found out the that he is a strange creature that is a mix of (fill in the blank)__________.

  18. filling in the blanks

    I saw (fill in blank) that BRITANY SPEARS had a bigger dick than Wilmer Valderrama. Wilmer Valderrama has a dick as small as(fill in the blank)OUR PRESIDENT. Wilmer Valderrama is not human because he does not have any sexual organs. Doctors have found out the that he is a strange creature that is a mix of(fill in the blank)MONKEY.

  19. say what?

    Lads he has no dick annnnnd he has a beer gut………oooooooh THATS so NOT HOT

  20. anon

    GUYS lookin at some other guys crotch is very gay

  21. think not (male)

    Hate to burst your bubbles but I actually hooked up with him at Whitsett Park several months back. Didn’t realize it was him till we were done and I said soemthing and he just smiled. Had a very nice ride too. As for his package, it was decent but not huge like some latin guys. On the slender side. Doubt he’s totally into guys but he did know what he was doing with me ;)

  22. LAFratDude

    Similar experience. He’s definately a cock cruiser. Hooked up with him at Elysian Park off Macbeth early this year. I figured it was him when I saw him walking around but I played it cool and didn’t say anything. I thought he had a nice package but definately not long and thick like some latin guys I’ve met. He was about 6 1/2 and medium thick. I think his “jean package” comes from his nice set of balls he had. Very nice. I know it was him because I had a friend look up his license plate afterwards and … :)

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