Well, that was traumatizing.
In its typical fashion, HBO’s Game Of Thrones really put fans through the wringer by making sure we got a second look at Craster’s creepy sex house and baby sacrificing in the woods. Thanks, writers.
But we also learned who the true killer of that lovable teddy bear King Joffrey. So who dunnit?
Well poor Sansa is stuck with Petyr Baelish who apparently is on his way to the Eyrie to marry her aunt Lysa. You might recall her from season one in which she was openly breastfeeding her six year old. Hot stuff. Baelish admits to Sansa that he arranged for Joffrey’s murder by having Olenna Tyrell rip off one of the jewels from the necklace he crafted for Sansa, which apparently was a vile of poison.
Olenna later reveals this to Margaery and encourages her to cozy up to the new King, young Tommen. Luckily, Margaery kept it innocent when she snuck into the boy’s room and chatted with him, even leaving him with a sweet kiss on the forehead before leaving.
Dany sends Grey Worm into Meereen to motivate the slaves to revolt and kill the masters. Because the masters knew Dany was on her way to defeat them, they killed 163 slave children and turned their bodies into road signs. Dany answered in kind, crucifying them despite her advisers telling her to have mercy. She now owns the city and awaits her next move.
Jaime finally visited Tyrion in the dungeons. He admitted that Cersei asked him to kill his brother and that he refused. He also doesn’t believe that Tyrion killed Joffrey. But there is little he can do for him now. Tyrion even mentions that Joffrey was Jaime’s son and he doesn’t correct him. Later on, Jaime has armor made for Brienne and gives her the valyrian steel sword forged from Ned Stark’s, telling her to find Sansa Stark and keep her safe. Brienne names the sword Oathkeeper and takes on Tyrion’s loyal squire Pod as her companion.
Bran, Hodor, Jojen, and Meera are out in the woods when they hear a baby’s cry. Unbeknownst to them, Jon Snow’s former brothers in arms are still kicking it at Craster’s place, raping and pillaging, even drinking wine out of their former commander’s skull. The last baby boy is born of one of the women and is taken out to the woods to be sacrificed to the white walkers. When Bran goes into the head of his dire wolf, he runs through the woods and falls through a trap.
The group decides to go back and grab both Summer and Jon Snow’s dire wolf Ghost, who is still locked up from the mutiny. But they are caught and Hodor is stabbed by the former crows. Then Bran reveals he is a high-born Stark when Jojen starts having a seizure and Meera is being abused. Jon Snow is on his way with more crows to recruit their former members in the upcoming battle against Mance Rayder. Hopefully he shows up to save Bran and the others before it’s too late.
And do we really need to see all the rapes of Craster’s poor daughters? God, how awful! To make matters worse, viewers had to watch a newborn baby being left to cry itself in the freezing cold. It was assumed up until now that the babies were being eaten by the white walkers, but at episode’s end we saw a walker carefully carry the baby boy back to his clan. Rather than eating the baby boy or killing him, he is touched by a sort of medicine man and morphs into a white walker himself! Totally cray!
What did you think of this week’s episode? Let us know in the comments below.