Friday Five: Lisa Timmons’ Top Five (Nina Raci Rules!)

It’s been a tough week covering Planet Trashbag. Lisa was front and center, covering Paris Hilton’s release and her subsequent televised pack of lies on the Larry King show. It takes a strong woman to be able to withstand all the cheese and fakery and bring it to you fresh and with a snarky spin. Lisa Timmons? She’s that woman.

1. Foxy Brown Gets A Taste Of Her Own Medicine -

Given her past of lashing out at the very people, whom she pays to beautify her, I wonder if Foxy will be able to find someone willing to help her put that stuff back in her head. I know I wouldn’t. If I saw her walking into my hypothetical beauty salon, I’d pretty much just assume that she was there to throw shit at me.

Lisa owns a hypothetical beauty salon, and the image of Foxy Brown entering and not saying anything and tossing Paul Mitchell product about in it is priceless.

2. Zach Braff Blogs That He’s Not a Player He Just Crushes A Lot – HAH! Lisa – bringing back the chorus of one of my favorite songs of yesteryear! You nasty! I don’t care!

3. Alan Cumming Gets Them Leaving – This is my favorite headline of the week from Lisa. I wish I’d written that. Lisa is a master of…was that a pun? She’s a mistress of puns!

4. Lisa’s Mom Gives Good Advice – Lisa on Marilyn Manson:

I didn’t really get too much dating advice from my parents growing up, but I specifically remember my mother telling me, “Lisa. You can’t trust a man without eyebrows. You just can’t.” And you know, what? She’s right.

Wise words, Lisa’s Mom. Lisa’s Mom and Ri-Ri Harvey need to hang out and have some Captain and Diet Cokes sometime.

5. Nina Raci FInally Confronts Her Haters – Lisa brought this to the world’s attention yesterday and the world should love her for it. I love how she portrays Nina as the person of importance that she is. This little girl is a howl. And she is matter-of-fact and will set you straight. And man, fifth grade broads can have frenemies, too, it sounds like.