Friday Five: J. Harvey’s Top Five

Look alive, it’s the Friday Five! And I’m some kind of rhyming kick! More exclamation points! Sorry guys, I’m a little revved up cause it’s the weekend again and I’ve had way too many cups of coffee for a woman of my build and tolerance. But enough about me (it’s never enough about me, is it?), let’s get down to the dirty, J. Harvey’s five posts that made me smile extra big this week.

1. Nasty Girl – When I realized that J. Harvey had chosen to quote “Nasty Girl” as the theme song for the series of pictures of Matthew McConaughey working out, I think I screamed laughing. And then stopped because I knew my neighbors would think I was getting murdered. And then I realized I lived next-door to Cam’ron, who wouldn’t call the police anyway, so whew!

2. Madonna’s Husband Is Full Of Derision, Advice – The way J. very matter-of-factly lists those things of which Madonna’s hubby, Guy is full, made me want to read the post. And then I stumbled upon this gem:

“There is no way in hell I’m driving myself around if rocks are being tossed about. I want a bulletproof car and I want it now! With a wet bar! And Bose speakers! The orphans don’t need to know about it.”

3. Larry Birkhead Into Dudes, Gets Sold Out – The title was good, but it was the “More gay madness after the jump,” that I particularly loved. And it was amusing to read the comments of those who have stumbled upon our blog for the first time and didn’t realize that J. was being completely serious when describing Birkhead as a “godless homosexual” cause duh, gays and catty gossip simply cannot coexist in nature.

4. You Would Think Someone That Stoned Wouldn’t Have The Energy To Be A Diva – J. starts off talking about Snoop Dogg, but the part about the Pussycat Dolls and their literacy difficulties are the creamy center of this post.

5. Sarah Ferguson And A Retinue Of Trannies – Because I’m already on a bit of a Pussycat Doll joke binge this week, I figured I’d bring your attention to this. Sexual reassignment is ripe for parody!