July 30th, 2007 // 7 Comments

This dude is such a creepshow. It was creepy enough when you just thought he was a closted queen in lust with his daughter’s then husband. But then he flipped the script and revealed himself to be way too into his daughter’s lives. And a little too admiring of their bodies. *shiver* Joe Simpson has revealed that Jessica was offered the role of a porn star but he turned it down. Does she get a say? Probably not. She’s still figuring out how to work lollipops and trying to remember her phone number.

“The last script that came to us was for Jessica to be a porn star,” Jessica’s father and manager, Joe Simpson, told PEOPLE at Thursday’s ABC Television Critics Association party in Beverly Hills.

“We were promised we would win an Oscar with that,” says Simpson, 49. “I was like, ‘Eh, we’ll just buy a [statue of a] little man and keep our clothes on.’ ”

“Our clothes”? In his mind, he is so inside her. 24-7. I bet this role was the Jenna Jameson movie. Jenna’s been shopping her autobiography around Hollywood and trying to get a big-name star to play her. This role could be a breakthrough for Jessica. Who in the hell wouldn’t go see that flick? Take it! She can’t act but the straight guys might get to see her ta-ta’s and the gays and women could get drunk at Chile’s beforehand and have themselves a merry old time.


By J. Harvey

  1. rob

    Wow, based on Dukes Of Hazzard and Employee Of The Month, I’m surprised Jessica’s getting anything other than porno scripts.

  2. rob

    Wow, based on Dukes Of Hazzard and Employee Of The Month, I’m surprised Jessica’s getting anything other than porno scripts.
    Anyone who sucks that much has a future in the adult industry.

  3. Shootingstar

    His comments are so incredibly creepy. I just got a chill up my spine.

  4. woohoo

    Definitly something wrong with him… It will only be a matter of time before the Jessica tell all book ” my daddy did me” hits the shelves

  5. Paul

    Reading this makes me glad I’m an Arcade Fire fan. Check out their song “Antichrist Television Blues”, it was going to be named Joe Simpson but they changed it to avoid legal troubles.

  6. Candy Apple

    Now that Jessica’s career is in the toilet and the public is pressing the flush lever, Pappa Joe once again pipes with his perverted way of trying to titillate everyone into thinking about his daughter in a sexual way. Even HE knows being sexy is all she has going for her. But you know, there’s lots of sexy girls out there, who in their late 20′s don’t have creepy daddies attached at their hip dictating what movies they can and can’t star in. It’s too bad he nixed the porn movie. Something like that might actually have revived some interest in her.

  7. blue lagoon

    Jessica looks great in the photos though. She’s really gotten her body in shape. She’s not too thin and looks healthy. She’s ruining her hair slowly. Jessica’s hair was about the best out there. Lately she as colored it too often. Lindsay Lohan ruined her beautiful mane too.

Leave A Comment