‘Dexter’ Recap: Everything Is Illuminated

This week on Dexter, our favorite serial killer came to some stark revelations about friends, the past and facing reality.

Dexter is giving all of Rita’s shoes to the Goodwill. This is a total bummer because Rita was hot and I’m sure she had a killer shoe collection. No pun intended. Its official, Dexter’s murdering has sort of allowed him to move on. I hate to be a negative Nelly, but I feel like Dexter’s grief is static and unbelievable, albeit nonexistent. Okay so maybe he killed a dude in a bathroom right after Rita died, but he hasn’t dealt with the loss of Cody and Astor. He has yet to actually mention Rita other than in passing or when the nanny quit. After four seasons of Rita, I feel like Dexter should cry or something, anything!

Harrison’s first words are, “Die die!” This is of course, totally epic.

“You are boning our target’s sister?” Yes he is, creepy suspended from law enforcement dude. Quinn is most definitely boning Deb. And also, they like, love each other. Weird. If they can look past both of their skeezy ways, this relationship may have a chance. Who am I kidding? This is Deb Morgan we are talking about. Based on that information, Quinn should be dead by the end of season five.

“You shot someone based on a feeling and an odor?”

Lumen is somewhat of a dumb shit. Whatevs. She has a more than reasonable excuse. She also sucks at shooting a gun. Good thing she is BFFFs with the best serial killer in Miami. Its also extremely hot watching Dexter do his crime scene solving thing. Seriously.

Dexter has a purse. Someone finally pointed this out. But let’s be clear, its a man bag.

Anytime Dexter is forced to take his shirt off is a good time. With Rita being dead and all, we get shorted on the hot man body scenes. So now the screenwriters have been reduced to gratuitous bloody shirt removal. And that’s good enough for me.

Dexter Morgan spit bath? Yes please.

Leave it to Masuka to once again be the comedic consistency in this show other than Deb’s dirty mouth. He easily plays into the ‘auto-erotic mummification’ scenario Dexter lays out for him, complete with mime motions and all. Beautiful.

Dexter finally had to face the ugly tub. I understand the writers had to bring us to this point somehow, but I felt as though Rita’s memory was cheapened by Lumen taking a bath. Like I said, I know this show is about blood and sex, but sometimes my heart does beat and I don’t think I’m the only one that wishes Dexter’s did also.