David Beckham Consoles His Balls

June 30th, 2008 // 4 Comments

I cannot imagine what my life would be like if I had such squirmy genitalia that required constant adjusting. Thank God my shit stays in place, or I’d probably only get half as much writing done on a daily basis as I do. My breasts are distracting enough as it is.

David Beckham grabbed his junk during the L.A. Galaxy’s game against D.C. United, who shut out David’s team 1-0. (CORRECTION: The score was 4-1 D.C. United. Sorry about that.) Poor David. At least he can go comfort himself by driving around in his Rolls Royce past some of his advertisements that he did for Giorgio Armani and say, “At least I’m still sexy.”

And filthy stinking rich. When he and his family are out to eat and the table is wobbly, he just folds up $100 bills and jams them under one table leg to straighten it out. That’s how rich people do things, y’all.

Click any of the photos to view the entire gallery of 33 photos of David Beckham.


I cannot imagine what my life would be like if I had such squirmy
genitalia that required constant adjusting. Thank God my shit stays in
place, or I’d probably only get half as much writing done on a daily
basis as I do. My breasts are distracting enough as it is.David
Beckham grabbed his junk during the L.A. Galaxy’s game against D.C.
United, who shut out David’s team 1-0. (CORRECTION: The score was 4-1
D.C. United. Sorry about that.) Poor David. At least he can go comfort
himself by driving around in his Rolls Royce past some of his advertisements that he did for Giorgio Armani and say, “At least I’m still sexy.” And filthy stinking rich.
When he and his family are out to eat and the table is wobbly, he just
folds up $100 bills and jams them under one table leg to straighten it
out. That’s how rich people do things, y’all.Click any of the photos to view the entire gallery of 33 photos of David Beckham.

By Lisa Timmons
  1. Julie

    The score was actually 4-1 DC United

  2. Selma

    I was there…It was awesome…but the score was 4-1. Unfortunately, Becks did not take his shirt off.

  3. Selma

    I was there…It was awesome…but the score was 4-1. Unfortunately, Becks did not take his shirt off.

  4. John

    I think it’s HOT when sexy guys grab their junks.

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