Caption Mariah

January 29th, 2007 // 16 Comments

(Image source)

By Jessica Marx
asl

  1. Pablo

    I have got the best body and graphic designer that money can buy. Wow they made me look skinny!!

  2. happy

    And photoshop can do the same for you too!

    or

    Look! I’m Almost Fully Clothed! Well, for me anyway…

  3. Marica De La Clase

    no wonder Heff said no to Kelly Osbourne. His team of photoshoppers could not handle another “project” after creating a new Mariah.

  4. Marica De La Clase

    no wonder Heff said no to Kelly Osbourne. His team of photoshoppers could not handle another “project” after creating a new Mariah.

  5. SAMMY

    OH SO I’M HOT RIGHT NOW……OOPS WHAT’S THIS?…LOOKS LIKE IM IN NEED OF A LITTLE BIKINI WAXAGE…

  6. czaiden

    Mariah Carey pauses for a moment to step into the shoes of her lawsuit victim Mary Carey, the porn star

  7. Bri

    Must be the same photoshop expert (or body stand-in) used on Idol Second Katherine McPhee, on a newstand cover recently. What’s the point?

  8. Mr.fucker

    u don’t know i much i want u ,i wanna fuck all day long u pussy make me horney

  9. Ani

    “Holy airbrush, Batman!”

  10. dawnn

    she is soooooooo airbrushed just look @ those lines under breast I am gonna puke now

  11. Drew

    I have never felt pretty enough or good enough so I must strip to prove to you that I am both.

  12. It’s Playboy, but I’m wearing more than I have in years. Oh, the — what’s that word? — icony!

  13. NOT A Bitch - unlike my predecessors

    Firstly – I think it’s HILARIOUS that this site claims to have a ‘Comment Policy’, when there’s nothing BUT malicious, inappropriate content plastered all over this page.

    Second – I’d like to know how many of you ‘people’ (who can’t survive without spewing venom on Mariah Carey at every available opportunity without ever really having a justifiable reason) have ACTUALLY SEEN MARIAH CAREY IN PERSON???

    My guess is not a one, because as someone who HAS seen the woman up close – stood right in front of on more than one occasion – I can tell you that the woman doesn’t have an OUNCE of fat ON HER. So why are you bitches hating?!?

    Furthermore there’s a second little FACT you digusting breeds managed to overlook (shock, horror); this picture is over 2 YEARS OLD, and if anything doesn’t look HALF AS GOOD AS SHE DOES IN REAL LIFE! So in essence, everything you little shits have bitched about here, like your words, are PURE NONSENSE!

    Seriously; has no one ever explained the importance of FACTS when you’re going to launch an attack? They’re what you call ‘metaphorical armour’ when you step out to do battle…They’re also what save you from looking like CHUMPS in public…Oh well; too late for some, I guess!!!!

  14. Paul

    I agree with most of what “NOT a Bitch” wrote (above). I have also seen Mariah up close and she is a lot more strikingly beautiful than any picture of her, airbrushed or not! Mariah Carey is breathtakingly gorgeous in person and she has a perfect hourglass figure (36DD – 24 – 36). She is simply one of the sexiest women on the planet. Playboy likes to airbrush ALL their models, even the 19 year old centerfolds. The problem with that is a lot of the models unique features are very beautiful and interesting but when they’re brushed out a lot of the sex appeal is lost. It was a shame that the only new pic was the cover. I don’t think this pic was over two years old as Playboy wrote in this issue… “Mariah turned up the heat by striking a pose before the lens of famed photographers Markus Klinko and Indrani for our cover”. The other two pics of Mariah in lingerie are amazing but were taken back in September 2005 for Allure magazine. In last months Playboy they promised to show Mariah “As you have never seen her before”. That was not true but I’m sure they sold a ton of magazines thanks to the sex appeal and beauty of Mariah! A lot of women are intimidated by someone as beautiful and sexy as Mariah but instead of being jealous and writing mean stuff about her they should better themselves by using Mariah as a rold model. At 36 she has gotten more beautiful and more curvy each year. Can any of these bitter, jealous posters say the same? Is Playboy knocking on their doors to pose on the cover to help sell the mag. We all know what the answer to these questions are. No and hell no! If ANY of these women posed for the cover of Playboy Hugh Hefner would have to stop publishing the mag and issue an apology to all mankind!

  15. paul atkinson

    there’s some real haters here and im sure 9 out of 10 have never seen mariah in person but would all jump at the chance with tongues draggin, she’s easily the hottest girl in the game and has been for over a decade. I think her handlers are lame because she should be treated as music royalty as she is and like one of the finest looking women on the planet, i wish she would give us more Mariah that’s for sure

  16. SWFLA

    I think that Mariah is fucking gorgeous, naturally.

    She is 5’9′ and curvy, and built like a brick shithouse. Gorgeous.

    I like her no matter what, when she first came out in the early 90′s she had a girls body, I didnt think much about her then. She now has a womans body,

    I think she looks GREAT when she is a
    a 12/14 maybe. She is gorgeous.

    The men who call her ‘cow’ or some other crap are insecure faggots who are intimidated by someone in Mariah’s league, have their own body confidence issues as men (they are insecure about being able to handle a woman, they like ‘girls’)

    She is another woman I would love to clone and keep the original.

    Gorgeous, period.

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